I won't Cross These streets til u hold my hand
by AsianOne
Summary: How do you make a Sakura Haruno cocktail? A. dash of Johnny Depp and a teaspoon of pink haired asian goodness B. put a spoon on your head and dance like a monkey or C. All of the above mix well with an Uchiha. Prefrebly, Sasuke.
1. Think pink? how about think Johnny Depp?

**I Won't Cross These Streets Until You Hold My Hand **

_Authors note_

Hi! Sorry for the really late update. My mom was convinced I need to get out more. So I did. Well, yeah so this fic is sasusaku. It's like about Sakura and other characters in modern day suburbia…it's in diary format and stuff so please read! It's based on a true story…It's practically non-fiction.

Sakura's P.O.V

Dear Johnny Depp,  
Therapy is gay and not in the happy way. I have decided this today. Mainly, because I have to write in this "therapy journal" every day, yeah, writing to you, you smexy mofo without actually writing to you. It's lame. A Therapy journal is a fancy word for a diary; you know how I feel about diaries! They are stupid pieces of paper bound together so anorexic blonde people can record all their miseries like "Mary didn't like my skirt today" or "I couldn't throw-up today and I think I officially weigh two pounds". Jeez, and as if this day couldn't get better the skanks (Brie, Brittany, Brianna, and Ino) have discovered I am alive and have recruited to be apart of their army of whores. This is fantastic! Not only do I go to therapy and I have naturally pink hair and green eyes and am somehow pure Japanese but now I'm a skank of the lowest degree. All I need to do to make this complete is to use a suspicious amount of self-tanner and go around saying "suki suki five dalla". It's just a matter of time before we all start getting manicures and shopping for thongs together. So now they have invited me to their party. I believe this is some kind of test to see if you can dry hump enough guys while you are there, dancing to see if are slutty enough for them. I blame the pink hair.


	2. The Party OF DOOM!

I Won't Cross These Streets Until You Hold My Hand

The moonlight splayed haphazardly across her petal locks making it have bluish purple glow as her slim, pale thighs seemed to dance in to the sea foam green of her mini skirt when she walked. She glanced up at the moon and the dark clouds, probably mentally predicting there was going to be rain, not paying any mind to the on looking admirers, having no idea of how the rest of the world viewed her. Then she opened her mouth and ruined it all.

"Fuck, fuck, oh shit, cold cold cold, fuck, mother fucking slut, move. People move. Fuck you, you stupid whore," came the flow of words out of her mouth. "What the fuck is taking so long? I need to get to a fucking party so then I can finally fucking sleep so Just put one foot in front of the other and fucking walk. Fuck lady, move out of my fucking way before I fucking move you."

Since she was mumbling complaints not many people took much notice but a few did and none of them looked happy.

"Don't fucking look at me like that or I'll fucking give you something to glare at. Thank you, now I don't have to look at your fucking ugly faces - oh, cold ,cold, cold! Who the fuck pushed me out into the fucking rain? I should fucking kill the lot of you... no I shouldn't. Too cold. I just fucking want to sleep if you fucking snails would just hurry the fuck up and _move _then I would not be SO DAMN ANGRY. Yeah, you heard me. Fine turn away, believe me you're not a pretty sight anyway. Jesus! And what happened to my brain when I decided to wear this damn skirt. There has to be someone hot at that party or I'm killing everyone."

**At The Party…OF DOOM!**

"Sakura!"

"Eh? Oh Ino it's you."

"Omigod! I'm so glad you could make it!"

"Yeah…"

"Come and dance with us!"

'This is what I hate about preppy/slutty people. I'm at a party for five minutes and then they already want you to start dry humping other girls. I must have passed like fifty people and seventeen plates of "special" brownies with Ino yanking me around like this.' She thought as she slowly looked up. It was like a movie. It just happened all too quickly; no one seemed to notice but them. When her eyes met his; and for at least a moment the world seemed to stop. As his midnight blue eyes crashed with hers.

**Sakura POV**

Okay, so there are two scenarios that could happen. Since, Ino has pulled me from the man of my dreams. I have only two options to stop Ino-pig and make her introduce me to the sexy beast. I could do:

A) scream at Ino:"STOP (bitch slaps) PUSHING (drop kicks) ME (rips out hair) AROUND (knees in crotch) LIKE (gouges eyeballs) I'M (snatches remaining hair out of scalp) YOUR (elbows ribs) BITCH!"

Or

B) ….Yeah…there was no plan "B" to start with; plan "A" is pretty much all I got.

Life has screwed me over for the five millionth time today and-

"Ino!"

I turned around then quickly turned back when I realized that I ain't Ino. Then Ino stopped dead in her tracks, which ended up making me almost lose an arm in the process. Apparently, Ino really wanted to talk to that person because she let go of my hand long enough to get some circulation going before pulling me to the person who had called her. And then it was like god was making up for the naturally pink hair and green eyes; there he was the man of my dreams. Screw plan A.

"Hey," he acknowledged me.

"H-hi," I stuttered, blushing at the sight of his smooth skin and perfect lips

Oh god. Nice one, Haruno, real smooth now he knows we're on to him.

"


	3. Sasuke!

**I won't cross these streets until you hold my hand**

"_HE SPOKE TO US! HE FREAKING SPOKE TO US! And you kind of blew it but he still spoke to us!"_ Inner Sakura screamed, dancing like a monkey.

I smiled to myself; I did kind of blow it. But, c'mon give the pink haired-jap a break **(A/n sorry if I offended anyone but if it makes you feel any better I'm Japanese). **

"umm…you still there?" he asked. "I didn't catch your name what was it?"

"Sakura. Haruno." I felt myself blush.

"You're Japanese?" he squinted at me.

"_GODDAMN! THE PINK HAIR!" inner Sakura cursed._

"AHHHH! IT MAY NOT SEEM LIKE IT BUT THEY'RE NATURAL!" I screeched immediately.

He eyed my chest suggestively, raising a perfect eyebrow, so perfect I wondered if he waxed.

"Not that you numbnut! My hair color. It's somehow freakishly natural." I panicked, covering my chest.

"I was about to say if you had any surgery done in that area you really didn't get your money's worth." He smirked.

"Shut up."

"_He's probably the hottest pervert I've ever seen" Inner Sakura mused._

"Yeah. I'm gonna go. This party sucks." I rolled my eyes and then covered my mouth when I realized Ino was still in ear shot.

"Oh shit."

"EXCUSE ME! DID YOU SAY SOMETHING SAKURA!" Ino screeched.

"I love the way the party doesn't suck."

"damn straight!" she screamed, obviously drunk.

"Later…I didn't get your name either.."I frowned

"Sasuke. Uchiha."

"cool."

"_HES' SOOOOOOOOOO COOOOOOOOOL! I JUST WANT TO JUMP UP AND RAPE HIM!" Inner Sakura screamed all crazy fan girl-like. _

"yeah. I know." I told her

This fic SUCKS...I might like just stop...ugh...why is my first fic wayyy more better? talk about a fucking sophomore slump...I think I'll right another chappie and if it's hopeless I'll stop...


	4. I have to WHAT?

I Won't Cross These Streets Until You Hold My Hand

"WHY THE HELL ARE YOU CALLING ME AT TWELEVE 'O CLOCK IN THE FUCKING AFTERNOON! SOME PEOPLE ARE TRYING TO FREAKING SLEEP!" I immediately screamed in to the phone as soon as I picked it up.

"Sakura! Shouldn't you be at school! And such a bad mouth! I thought I raised you better than that!"

"Ugh…mom not right now"

"_This is the exact reason why I'm glad they made me move out of that big ass mansion filled with pink-haired snobs that claim paternity over us. Always acting like they've got silver spoons shoved up their asses…same dumb questions; why fucking call the house phone if you expect us to be in school?"_ Inner Sakura screamed half at me, half at my mother; she was still grumpy from being waken up.

"Sakura, honey? Are you still there? Goodness, I don't know where I went wrong. You were such a good child." My mom snubbed at us.

"_Where did you go wrong? Don't freaking make me laugh. Maybe when you hired Maria, the transvestite from Ukraine to baby-sit me, DUDE! She gave me my first few shots of tequila when I was like five and used to drive me to kindergarten on her moped. Maybe that's where you went wrong, dumbass." _Inner Sakura hissed.

"Sakura? Did you hear me? " Mother inquired.

"Eh?"

"I said I want you to visit your father and I next month."

"WHAT!"

"Yes, oh and bring a date. You know, we're expecting you to get married soon."

"YOU ARE FUCKING NUTS! I'M FOURTEEN!"

"Again with the terrible language I don't know where you learned that kind of talk I mean your father and I never ha-"

"I HAVE TO GET MARRIED SOON!"

"Well, me and your father would like you to date someone respectable; that you could marry; and soon. It's for the best, honey. We don't want you to be the kind of girl who sleeps around until she finds someone she wants to spend her life with but then can't because you have AIDS"

"Mom, I'm fourteen. FOUR-FUCKING-TEEN. EMPHASIS ON THE TEEN PART. "

"That doesn't stop the other fourteen year olds who go out and get pregnant."

"I'm not a whore. Is there something about me that makes me seem like the type to sleep around?"

"The fact that you moved away from your family to live in some horrid excuse for an apartment to go to that _horrible_ public school and you dumped your nice boyfriend. Probably so you could sell your body. I was right to put you in therapy. Speaking of which, are you keeping up with your therapy journal?"

"First of all, I moved because you told me to get out. Second, I dumped my "nice" boyfriend because, NEWS FLASH! He's GAY! And he always has been okay? And yes, I've been keeping up on the goddamn therapy journal"

"Well, you were smoking and drinking what did you want us to say? Stay Sakura, come back to your room in an ungodly hour smelling of liquor and tobacco its okay, we just let you live here for free!"

"Well that would be a nice change of pace; instead of you yelling at me to stop doing drugs which I never have tried and demanding me to get on birth control for sex that I'd never had."

"You're a compulsive liar."

"Speaking of compulsive liars, according to you if I had sex as much as you say I would have about eighty children and slept with 65 men and dead from AIDS and drug over dose."

"Sakura, you may not get pregnant the first few times you have sex but sooner or later you will."

"I'M NOT HAVING SEX!" I screamed.

"JUST COME OVER NEXT MONTH AND BRING THE GUY YOU HAVE PROBABLY BEEN SLEEPING WITH!" My mom screamed back.

"Whatever." I said, way too tired to argue anymore.

Then she kind of just went on about how she wants me to be decently dressed and my date not to be some hobo. Ugh. Hobo? I'm so not kinky like that. This woman is so demeaning…a hobo? C'mon, woman! This is why everyone thinks my self-esteem is low. My mom only thinks I'm capable of attracting a hobo. No wonder I'm in therapy. This lady has made me FUCKED UP.

"Sakura? Are you listening to me?'

"Wha- Uh yeah"

"Honestly, sometimes I just feel you're never listening."

"You have no idea."

How was that to clear things up a bit? I think this Chappie was okay. I'll write the next one with a little sasusaku oomph. Whatever that means. So yeah. Thanks to all my reviewers especially bluedragon212 I love you! You review the most and give me constructive criticism. You complete me. Just kidding. Keep reviewing or I will hunt you down and EAT YOU.


	5. School OF DOOM!

_**I won't Cross these streets until You hold my hand**_

I was going to have to go to school. I don't think I could stand another mother-rant it's really too much for me. With all the shit I have to deal with, the last thing I need is an angry menopausal woman who vents her pent-up rage about how her butt is getting saggy and the fact that dad doesn't want to have sex anymore, on her only child: me. With that being said, I rush off to school, the place of learning and fun. More like the place of drug dealing and drive-bys. But what's the difference?  
When I got to school I saw the usual. Ino the most popular girl; and probably the most bulimic girl in Konoha High puking up a storm with Bri, Brianna, Brittany, Summer, and Autumn. Hinata being...Well,Hinata-like. Kiba peeing on stuff with his dog. Shikamaru sleeping while saying "troublesome...",obviously stoned. Shino quietly talking to himself in a corner. Neji, staring down a squrriel Lee prancing around to "Beautiful Soul" by Jesse McCartney in his SKINTIGHT green jumpsuit, reenacting a scene from Bambi 2. I had to look away...THAT DAMNED SUIT SHOWED EVERYTHING.  
"IT'S LIKE HE'S FRICKING TRYING TO SMUGGLE GRAPES!" Inner Sakura screamed while she covered her eyes from the evil but it didn't stop us from being temporarily blinded.  
This was going to be a long day. English. The usual; no one paying, the deaf philipino lady who claimed to be our teacher, any mind. I mean who gives a flying fuck if the comma goes there or you capitalize after a period! it all sounds the same when you read it. Gym was going okay until I had to partner up with Sharpova; the obese chick with the unibrow who somewhat resembles a monkey humping a heifer, well, she attempted to do the splits. And let's just say Sharpova decided to announce she's going commando in public without saying a word; right in front of me. I spent a lot of time in the school therapist's office after that ordeal. Just in time to miss the only class I don't mind: art. But just in the nick of time for history. Oh lord. We were simply asked to name a country and some dumbass yelled out "UTAH"  
So we had a hour and a half lecture about the difference between countries and states. Not that I was a big fan of learning but, goddamn let's move on to something; say a little out of the SPECIAL EDUCATION level. And math. Ahhh, math. Not only am I the only Asian who has natural pink hair but I'm also the only Asian who is bad at math. I hate math with a passion. If I ever had the chance to meet the person who invented math I'd rip his (it's most likely a man) eyeballs out, chop his balls off and trick him in to eating it. Then I'd slice every limb off his body slowly with a dull butter knife then drag him by his hair to the nearest car, slam the door on his head and drive for about fifty miles, dragging his limbless body across the steaming asphalt. Unless he was hot then it's a completely different story. But I doubt that, I mean what hot guy ever invented any thing? Yeah, that's right, none, nada, zip, zero. So yeah; you get the basic idea. Math sucks big time. End of discussion. Finally the school day ends. With Lee announcing to the whole school his eternal, youthful, burning love for me, in return, the people that actually cared were loudly contemplating if I was really a guy because there is no possible way to use the words 'Lee' and 'straight' in a sentence unless there is a 'not' or 'no fucking way' in front of it. A nice topper on my wonderful day. I had no plans what so ever after school because I'm a loser, so I figured I'd walk down to the Seven Eleven by my crap-apartment, buy a Slurpee and a king sized Snickers, settle in to my pajamas and watch the Gilmore Girls while wallowing in self pity. What I didn't count on was running head first in to metal pole then tripping over the curb, face planting in to cement. I picked myself up, praying to God no one saw. "Sakura"  
"Sasuke! oh shit! um...what are you doing here?" I frantically flapped my arms, trying to dust myself off, praying harder than ever, that he didn't see me face-plant in to the sidewalk.  
"um...I live near here. Are you okay? Nasty fall." he said, trying to suppress his laughter.  
"IT'S NOT WHAT IT LOOKS LIKE! THAT DAMN POLE CAME OUT OF NOWHERE AND PUNCHED ME IN THE FACE THEN THE CURB OF THE SIDEWALK LURCHED AT ME, SIDE SWEEPING ME, MAKING ME LOOK LIKE I TRIPPED WHEN IN REALITY I GOT MY ASS HANDED TO ME BY INANIMATE OBJECTS! GODDAMMIT! THEY'RE LIKE FREAKING NINJAS!" I started to flip out.  
"That's a likely story." he mused, probably thinking I was crazy.  
"Yeah, damn straight. File that one under strange but true." I spat back. "Haruno"  
Then I turned around to meet with none other than Neji Hyuuga. "Whaddya want, pretty-man? I'm busy." I rolled my eyes at that guy, psh, always acting like Mr. tough. "For you to move your ass so we can go to Uchiha's" he raised his eyebrows, as if to add, not that you're invited or anything. "Whatcha gonna do over there, Hyuuga? try to rape him"  
"You can come and watch Sakura-chan" Kiba teased, as he playfully poked Neji's arm. A little to playfully if you ask me, an excuse to touch his arm, perhaps? I wondered if they were a couple.  
"Yeah, Sakura you should come..." Shikamaru grinned sheepishly, still baked, thanks to Ino's party. 'what is up with all these hot guys popping up outta nowhere?' Inner Sakura pondered Then came to the conclusion that the writer is too damn lazy to give them a proper introduction but quickly decided it was okay because they were all so goddamn hot. "Sasuke?" I gave him the please-can-I-come-over-to-your- house-look "Hn"Sasuke...Hn-ed. "I'll take that as a HELL YES!"Inner Sakura,smirked. As I followed the Sasuke and the guys to his apartment.


	6. I choose

**I won't Cross these streets until You hold my hand**

Okay, not Sasuke's apartment. I should say their apartment. Those gayballs shared an apartment. Okay, actually it was two apartments, but they were conjoining, so technically, it was one. And surprisingly was in the same complex as mine. _"Those homos better not rape Sasuke"_ Inner Sakura warned as we walked in to the room. _"OH MY GOD SASUKE SHOWERS AND SLEEPS AND DOES OTHER STUFF OVER HERE!_" Inner Sakura screamed, bowing down in awe. I ignored her and directed my attention to the small mob of underage hot guys that were smoking and drinking at 3:30 in the afternoon.

Sasuke, I quickly learned was my age (14) but already was a man of a few words (I'm sorry to say the same thing did not go with his drinking habits as well). And when I mean a few words I mean the words, "hn" in various tones. If he grunted an "hn" it basically meant: "Whatever. I don't give two shits". A slightly higher pitched "hn" translates to: "Shut the hell up for one goddamn minute before I rip your jugular out." A regular "hn" means: "hn". At least he had a sense of humor; he's hysterical if you like those crazy homicidal jokes. Most people don't. So they kinda just write him off as a crazy homicidal hot guy. What can I say? he kind of is.

You'd expect Neji to be almost exactly the same as Sasuke and well; just a tad bit more on the feminine side. But he isn't what he looks like or acts like at all. He was only 15 and his good looks and his perfect skin, hair, and aloof attitude seemed to get him by with anything and got him whatever he pleased and concealed the fact that he was like any other horn dog. Just a little feminine; not gay in the very least though, I had come to find out. He was actually very perverted underneath it all. He acts all silent and tough but what you don't realize is the whole reason why he's quiet is because he's actually looking at your chest or trying to imagine what your butt might feel like. Uugh. Sicko.

Kiba was most definitely the strangest in the group, but nonetheless a very nice person. Really, a free spirit, a strong animal rights activist. Willing to do anything for animals, especially dogs. When he wasn't helping animas he was a... FREESTYLE RAPPER, YO!(note: the furry hood/parka type thing he refuses to take off even in 90 degree weather). He's convinced that he is an OG. Unfortunately he sucks at rapping.

Shikamaru seemed to be the only person who thought Kiba was any good. But that was mainly because he was stoned practically 24/7. A lot of people seemed to think he was some sort of genius. Probably because he had crazy ass hair and was always staring at stuff like clouds and inanimate objects. I guess people put two and two together and decided he was like the next Einstein or something.

"Sakura-chan?" Kiba's cheerful voice suddenly bringing me out of my thoughts.

"What?" I said, staring at the Sasuke.

"Ummm...you're drooling."

"NO! No I'm not." I lied desperately trying to hide my spit.

"Yeah, you are. But the real question is why? Because of Sasuke, perhaps?" he grinned mischievously.

"No..."I blushed and mentally cursed myself for making it so damn obvious that I like Sasuke.

Then my phone rang.

"What?" I said.

"The dinner is being changed to this Friday at 7:00-p.m. I trust you have your date and I also hope that you realize today is Thursday." My mother immediately answered.

"Yeah, yeah. My date I got one. Goodbye." I lied

"I expect to see that he is-"

Click.

I just hung up on my mother and had to get a date by, at the most tomorrow morning. I was in deep shit.

"CRAP!"I cursed

"What?" Kiba asked as he prodded my knee with his finger.

"DON'T TOUCH ME BITCH-BOY! I'M HAVING A CRISIS!"

"Calm down and explain your self." Kiba half growled half purred.

"Ihavetogetadatebytonight."I said letting it out in one breath.

"Slower" Neji coaxed, joining the conversation.

"Date. I need one. NOW."I sputtered through gritted teeth.

"Is that it?" Neji asked, surprised.

"Yeah." I blushed.

"What? That's so minor. I'm sure Lee would be happy to go." Kiba said.

I felt my eyes go wide. "FUCK NO! I'D RATHER HUMP A DOG THAN TAKE LEE!" I screamed, exaggerating a bit.

"Is that an offer?" Neji asked, grinning pervertedly.

Kiba quickly ran out of the room to find Akamaru and hide him.

"FUCK! I'm serious, not Lee or anyone like that" I felt very desperate all of a sudden.

"How about Shika?" Neji suggested.

"His head looks like a pineapple and would probably try to converse with the wax fruit." I grinned sheepishly at Shikamaru as a silent apology who nodded and said

"Poppycock."

"Kiba?" Neji tried again.

I shook my head, wondering how long was it til he said Sasuke.

"Me?" He asked.

"No." I gave him a suspicious look.

"Sasuke?"

"Well, he's the only one who isn't busy tomorrow. I guess he'll have to do." I smiled at Sasuke

"Um, Sakura? **Everyone **_except_ **_Sasuke_** isn't busy tomorrow." Neji said in a flat voice.

"Hn." Sasuke agreed.

"Please Sasuke! Pretty please! I need someone presentable for my parents." I begged him, on my knees.

"_I'm _not presentable!" Neji gasped.

"Fuck no." I answered.

"Sasuke-kun please!" I begged him again.

"No." Sasuke said.

"PLEASE!"

"HELL NO!" Sasuke screamed, "For the last time, NO! Never."

"Do you hate me that much?" I almost was sobbing.

"Ye- look, forehead you're really pissing me off, here. I'm not going to that stupid thing you want me to go to. Not now, Not EVER." Sasuke growled.

At that point I was sobbing and pounding my fists in to Neji's chest as he tried to comfort me/ feel me up, but I didn't care. I didn't even really know Sasuke and he's already walking all over me.

"Fine, I'll go." Kib patted my back.

"BITCH! DID I SAY YOU COULD TOUCH ME? I'M GOING THROUH TRAUMA AND I NEED A FUCKING MOMENT!" I screamed at Kiba.

Neji and Kiba both backed off toward Sasuke, fearing their lives were at stake. Neji whispered something in Sasuke's ear. Sasuke's eyes widened and his face went red. I tensed up; they were talking about me I heard Neji say Sakura! Maybe Sasuke could come after all.

"No way." Sasuke said in a hoarse whisper.

"Oh yeah." Neji confirmed.

"Seriously, there is a new Card Captor Sakura series? you've got to be fucking joking." Sasuke mused.

"It's true. I speak no lies," Neji said with a grin.

I wanted to die. Sasuke, the only guy in the world who actually cared about Card Captor Sakura, burned me. I suck. I deserve Lee. I suck.

"And Sakura's family has all the books. _All of them_. She was telling me that earlier, isn't that right, Sakura?" Neji winked, a silent indication for me to play along.

"Psh, totally. I have all of them to like volume 97." I blurted out, sounding like an idiot.

"OMG! I HAVE TO READ SO MUCH I'M SO BEHIND! I'LL SOOOO GO TO YOUR THING!" Sasuke squeled, showing a side of him I've never seen before.

"Pick me up at 6:00," I said.

"HELLS YES!" he screamed.

I so had this one in the bag.

Hey y'all. Sorry for the really loooong update. Extreme holy crap writers block. Oh yeah, and also if you like Card Captor Sakura sorry. I don't hate it but I needed to make fun of it in order to make this story work. So yeah. Read and review tell me how ya like it!


	7. Sasuke POV

I won't Cross these streets until you hold my hand

It was 6:00 on the dot when I picked Sakura up. She seemed awed by the limo; did she expect anything less from an Uchiha? She saw me and seemed bothered about something.

"Sakura, what's wrong?" I asked her, throwing her, get-in-the-fucking-limo hints.

"The fact you're in cosplay, but not only that but you're dressed up as Sakura." She screeched, oh the irony of her name.

"Put up or shut up." I shrugged.

"CHANGE!" She demanded.

"Fine. Bitch." I said as I began to change.

"Not in front of me, you drag queen!" She screamed, peeking through her fingers, trying to look like she was shielding her eyes. What can I say? I'm a sexy beast. So I changed as she wished.

"Much better." She nodded her head and finally got in the limo, giving the directions to the driver. Then settled in for the forty-five minute drive to her house.

"Sasuke?" she lifted a dainty eyebrow; did she wax?

"Hn." I acknowledged her.

"Thanks for coming with me." she blushed.

"Hn." I hn-ed again, finding nothing else to say.

For a second, she shut her mouth and stared at me with growing intensity. And just for a moment or two she looked beautiful. But then she started to jabber away again and the beauty was gone.

"I love puppies don't you, Sasuke?"

"Hn"

"Eggs are like really creepy."

"Hn"

"I love how Rita Hayworth can't act for some reason"

"Hn"

"Kitties are really cute."

"Sakura..."

"Chalupas kick so much ass! They taste too damn good it should be a sin to even eat them."

"SAKURA ..."

"Do you like squirrels? cuz I do."

"SAKURA!"

"I begged my parents for a fish once and when I finally got one I ate it."

"SAKURA!"

"You know what bugs me? Airplanes. We are all in such a rush to get on that when they tell us to line up; we lose the ability to form a line. Then we all crowd in and fight for the overhead bins. And when we land, everyone seems to be taking their time. It's like look man, I have been on this goddamn plane for 7 hours. Get your things and get to baggage claim and

While your at it, please neuter the guy behind me that has been kicking my

Seat and using my seat back as a helping hand to get up and sit down over and over and over again. And also, keep your kids off the freaking baggage claim belt. Sure, the kid in Jerry McGuire was really cute when he was lost and came rolling around on the thing, but get this-I want my suit case and I want it now and if your kid gets his hand caught in the belt, chances are it will shut down and I will stand here while they cut his hand off with a saw and-" she jabbered, but was interrupted when I grabbed her head and put my lips on hers.

I couldn't take it anymore, I just spent the whole time thinking this is the only way to make her shut up, over and over again but I couldn't help but enjoy the feeling of her lips over mine.

"This is the only way you would shut up..." I whispered.

She searched my eyes with hers. I suddenly couldn't breathe. Why couldn't she always be like this?

"Sasuke..."

"Yeah?"

"Why are you whispering?"

"Get off me, Haruno."

"Hey, you jumped me." she said.

She's simple but confusing. One moment she's in love with me the next moment she wants to destroy me. I can't understand her. I hate her but I don't. She's constantly getting stalking me and getting in my face. But I wouldn't have it any other way.


	8. Sakura POV

**I won't cross these streets until you hold my hand**

That couldn't of fucking happened. SASUKE KISSED ME! AHHHH! WHAT NOW! PROPOSE AND BANG HIM RIGHT IN THE LIMO!...Ugh I sound like my mother...But that moment he kissed me, it was the closest thing to complete chaos I had ever felt before. Because #1: There were multiple thoughts running through my head: A) SASUKE KISSED ME! and B) Holy shit.

Also, there was #2,Inner Sakura screaming: "Good, you've got him unaware, NOW!...SQUEEZE HIS ASS!"

"Haruno. Off. NOW." Sasuke demanded in a harsh voice bringing me back to the real world (in which he kissed me in!)

"I DON'T WANNA!" I pouted.

"OFF!" Sasuke yelled, trying to push me off him (and messing up the hair I spent two hours perfecting at the same time). Awww, Sasu-kun's just playing hard to get.

"NOOOOOO! I DON'T WANNA GET OFF!" I calmly, informed him.

"AHHH! GET THE HELL OFF ME, YOU CRAZY BITCH!" Sasuke screamed; still playing hard to get. He even gave me a nickname: Crazy bitch. Ahhh, true love at last.

Sasuke finally pulled me off and ended our little love-fest. I had to admit, I was a little tired of it. Well, not really. Anyway, everything was going great until I reached my old house or Hell as I like to call it. It's not like I _expected_ it to go well but I had my hopes...

**In Hell (my old house)**

"Sasu-kun! Ring the bell I want mother to see you first!"

"Go to hell. Go to hell. Go to hell. Go to hell. Go to hell." he responded...in a loving way...kind of...

"That's funny Sasu-kun because we are in hell." I said; laughing, that Sasuke, he's a riot, that one.

"DIE! JUST DIE ALREADY! JUST LOOKING AT YOU MAKES ME WANT TO SLIT MY WRISTS! AUGHH! DIE!" he screamed taking a knife out of his pocket, he really should do stand-up...

"Hahahaha, Sasu-kun you're so funny...Sasu-kun? Sasu-kun? HOLY CRAP! WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO YOURSELF WITH THAT KNIFE! STOP! STOP. GET THAT THING AWAY FROM YOUR HEAD! AHH! YOU SHANKED ME! YOU ASS! THIS ISN'T FUNNY SASUKE! NOW IT'S BLEEDING! YOU PIECE OF CRAP! DOES THIS CUT LOOK PAINFUL! BECAUSE IT IS! DAMN YOU! AUGHHH! IT HURTS LIKE A FRICKING BITCH!" I screamed at Sasuke, trying not to get blood all over everything.

"OH! HOW I SHALL OPEN A FACTORY THAT PRODUCES ONLY LEFT SOCKS! AND BY DOING THAT I SHALL TAKE OVER THE WORLD!" Sasuke bellowed, then laughed manically; which I am guessing means that he's sorry he shanked me with that knife. Come to think of it, why did he have that knife?

"M-mom?" I stuttered as the older woman with pink hair opened the door.

I kind of gasped. What in the name of all that is right and made of chocolate did that broad do to her hair! Either she is morphing in to a pink marshmallow bunny or she severely pissed her hairdresser off. I really can't decide. But unlike bunnies, which are sex machines; my mother probably hasn't got laid since like the fifties. Back then everyone got laid, fat, short, tall, small, ugly, pink haired- it didn't matter. So I'm going with the hairdresser option. The bunny woman stared a Sasuke-kun with cold eyes, looking my man, up and down; I swear, she let her eyes linger a bit at his ass. She looked back up at him then warmly smiled. Just when I thought she might approve she says the worst possible thing any mom could say _ever!_

"Did you knock up my daughter on the way here?"

Sasuke shrugged.

The stupid bunny woman turned to me, "What happened? And what did you do to your hair? It's disgusting! How did you manage to mess it up so terribly? Propose then bang him in the limo?" she asked pointing to Sasuke, for emphasis before continuing to rant on "Jesus Christ, I raised you so well, so I don't where you learn this from."

"Mom, my name is Sakura, not Jesus Christ. I'm sure you would know this if you _actually_ raised _me_. Also, although, I am in many ways like the good lord; maybe now would be a good time to see that I don't have a _fucking beard_ or have ever rose people from the dead or have possession of a _penis_, for that matter."

Sasuke looked amused.

"Yes, I said 'penis' " I added, mainly for Sasuke's enjoyment.

"You know what I mean, Sakura." bunny woman said; her only come back, motioning for the butler to take our coats and usher us inside the hellhole.

Oh boy.

Hey, it's Lauren. I'm starting to feel like writing more thanks to all you reviewers. You guys kick ass! I seriously love you all in a non-lesbian way (no offense if you are, I'm just not like that) even the person who said I was "a fucking crazy" whatever that's supposed to mean. Anyway, I'd like to say a special thanks to: Bluedragon212,SaskuraChan, and Warmth of the Afterglow. These peole are _the _SHIT! If there were a award for the most kickass readers they would win in a heartbeat(if any of you feel left out don't worry I love ya!. Also, feel free to look at my other fics, Actually, no, I COMMAND you to read 'To Know You Is To Hate You So Loving You Must Be Like Suicide' (GaaraXSakura) and 'Hard To Say' (ItachiXSakura) which are both complete fics. Read and review, bee-otches!

XOXOXOLaurenXOXOXO


	9. another chapter in sasuke's pov

**I won't cross these streets until you hold my hand**

Shit. Fuck. Damn. Sakura has a HOT mom. It's like a fact of the earth, now. Seriously, she's a bit on the older woman side but HOT DAMN! That lady has it GOING ON! The weird thing was that she looks like she hadn't been laid since the like the fifties. And back then EVERYONE had sex. Whatever; she still was hot.

"May I ask what your name is, young man?" Asked the hot lady who is said to be Sakura's mom.

"Sasuke. Uchiha."

"Oh...Yes. I know your family." She answered thoughtfully.

"Really." I replied, staring at her chest. Hey, I may be drop dead gorgeous but I'm still a guy.

"Didn't your brother murder your whole family and then try to brutally anally rape you?" She questioned as if she was asking me if I wanted a piece of toast. What a fucking marvelous conversation starter. And I thought Sakura had terrible social skills.

"Mom..." Sakura growled through gritted teeth, turning beet red.

"It's okay Sakura. Uh, yeah, why yes that's my family." I said, trying to restrain myself from tearing off every limb on that hags body. Psh. I wondered why this woman hadn't got laid since the fifties.

"Oops. I forgot about the kettle." The old wench smiled; turning around to rush back into the kitchen.

Thank God. That woman was worse than Sakura. No wonder she doesn't live with her.

**TWO HOURS LATER**

"I heard age slows you down, but Goddamn this is pushing it." Sakura frowned, getting up and walking toward the kitchen.

"Hn" I agreed.

Sakura stopped in front of me; dead in her tracks and let out a shrill scream. Then she stopped and let awkward silence fill the air.

"Sakura?" I asked giving her a little push.

Then I saw it; the hottest mom in the world, dead as a doorknob, next to the blender, covered in blood, low fat yogurt, and three pieces of burnt toast. Sakura's body rigid in fear. I quickly called 911. They came as fast as I called; shooing us off so they could examine the body in private.

"She's gone." Sakura said in a deadpan voice.

"Umm...Not really. She's dead but she's still in the kitchen technically..." I tried to console her.

"You suck at comforting me! Hello! my mom just fucking died and I never even got to say goodbye...Or I love you even though you're a complete bitch or I'm sorry...I-I" Her voice quivered a bit then she began to sob and cling to my shirt.

"It's okay, c'mon smile. It's uhh...alright. Seriously, Sakura it's not like that hag was going to live forever. Plus, she pratically abandoned you." I once again tried my hand at comforting the pink headed jap. And for what reward? Oh nothing; just a BROKEN RIB CAGE. What a wench.

"B-b-b-but Sasuke y-y-you don't understand s-s-she w-w-was my m-m-mother" Sakura choked through her sobs, inbetween punches she was throwing at my chest.

"Look, Sakura I'm sorry your mom died. This sobbing and screaming thing was cute the first five minutes but now I feel like a tow truck ran over my rib cage and plus I'm bored. Just tell me where the CCS books are and you can hit me and cry as much as you want."

"I HATE YOU! YOU DIDN'T WANT TO COME HERE FOR ME YOU JUST WANTED TO READ CARD CAPTOR SAKURA! AND NEWS FLASH! MR. CHICKEN HEAD WE DON'T HAVE ANY OF THAT SHIT! DO YOU KNOW WHY? BECAUSE CCS SUCKS! AND IT ALWAYS HAS AND ALWAYS WILL. YOU'RE SUCH A LOSER! I HATE YOU! I HATE YOU! I HATE YOU!" Sakura screamed at the top of her lungs.

"You're completely correct on the first part. I didn't come here for you. But you have two things wrong. Card Captor Sakura does not suck and the BACK OF MY HEAD DOES NOT LOOK LIKE A CHICKEN!" I just lost my fucking cool. I couldn't control myself and I pinned her against the wall. She whimpered and turned away from me; refusing to look me in the eye.

"Sakura." I breathed her name across her cheek.

"Umm...Maybe this is a bad time to say Mrs. Haruno is dead." the medic said, staring at me then to the pink head I was holding up against the wall, our lips dangerously close.

"No shit. I could of told you that." I hissed to the "doctor".

"We did everything we could. We're so sorry. It must have been a tough life for her. We examined her and it seems she hasn't had any sexual contact since the fifties. But EVERYONE had sex in the fifties."The medic sadly shook his head.

"How did she die?" Sakura asked in a small voice; still turned away from me.

"A strange freak murder involving a blender, low fat yogurt, three pieces of burnt toast, and Jessica Alba holding a knife covered in blood. We have no idea who could have done this." The medic wiped a tear from his eyes.

"What about Jessica Alba? She's got a fucking knife covered in blood, Magnum P.I" I said sarcastically.

"Are you on drugs? Jessica Alba is too hot to do anything like this." The medic waved to his group and they quickly carried the corpse out of the house. Leaving, me and Sakura alone.

"Saku-" I stopped in mid sentance. Her lips crashed in to mine. preventing, any sound that could come out of my mouth to stop. She deepened the kiss and opened her mouth to me and I immediatly dipped my tounge in. It's a guy thing I guess. Her tounge followed mine- for awhile. She soon started to nibble on my lower lip. Then she pulled back and turned away, blushing as if this _never_ happened before. I tilted her head back toward my lips and met her lips with mine for the third time. Oh, what the hell, her mom died, let her take advantage of me. It's not like this means anything anyway... Right!

This chapter is dedicated to my buddy Cole. He taught me how to think like a guy so I could make this chapter most realistic as possible. Personally, I hate this chapter which is the main reason I'm dedicating this to him. Well, Thanks for reading! until the next chappie.

XOXOXOLaurenXOXOXO


	10. Over it?

**I won't cross these streets until you hold my hand**

I couldn't believe she was gone. Nor, the fact that Sasuke was a arrogant ass...And a good kisser. My mom died and not one word of comfort escaped from his perfect lips.

"The limo's here." Sasuke said.

I got in and nothing more was discussed. Sasuke looked out the window and ignored me. What was he thinking about? Was he mad at me? I yelled at him. What is going on in that brain of his?

I narrowed it down to two options:

'KILL! MUST KILL SAKURA! SHE LIED ABOUT THE CARD CAPTOR SAKURA BOOKS AND YELLED AT ME! KILL!'

Or, from the mind of a horny 14 year old:

'Masturbate...Masturbate...MUST ignore Sakura so I can go home and masturbate...'

Or what if he just doesn't like me or what if... I'm a terrible daughter. My mom was murdered and I'm worrying about Sasuke. I hate this. He's everything to me. It's so pathetic. I don't even really know him. He's just some guy I worship because I think he's hot.

We finally arrived at our apartments and I don't know why but I couldn't stop crying.

"Goodnight" was all he said. And he left me in the front of my apartment. With the girl who was in ragged jeans with holes, an "I Love Elvis" shirt, and a purple sequined military jacket paired with a patent leather messenger bag. And flip-flops.

Isn't that what Anna Wintour wore on her wedding day? But I didn't have the heart to point that out to her. The tears kept on coming and it seemed like the words kept getting stuck in my throat.

So here I am, trying to get my shit together; pampering my body by eating a lot of chocolate and pampering my brain by reading a article on mascara. Two hours later my shit was NOT together, and I felt fat, mother-less, but well informed about mascara. Which is a plus.

I hate what he does to me.

I don't like what I'm writing. Someone please give me a little constructive criticism. It would help. I love you all. Anyway, I thought this might be good time to address something I need to get out to the world; Ashlee Simpson this is to you if you are reading this.

Dear Ashlee,

I want you to know that I don't really think you're all that bad. I would exhibit the same propensity for manly bravado too if I was the daughter of the creepiest freaking person ever. I did sign the Stop Ashlee petition, however, and thank Christian for pointing it out, because, sometimes, I just have the urge to jettison you into a river of magma and shit. But I must say, I applaud your courageous approach to style. I don't like it, you can't dress yourself, but I like the fact that you're so unafraid- it takes solid nads to wear everything in your wardrobe at once. I thought it was especially daring when you wore those argyle golf pants with that sweater vest- be careful, though, doll. Pants that tight can give you nasty yeast infections.

Ashlee, keep goin' on. But please, stop singing. And hire a stylist. Because YOU are the reason North Korea's gonna nuke our asses.

Love and pitchforks,

Asian One


	11. New woman?

**I won't cross these streets until you hold my hand**

Dear Johnny Depp,

I am a new woman. Sasuke is not even in my vocabulary. I spent all last night trying to get over him. And I now am. So anyway, went to the mall today, and spotted Sharpova by Abercrombie. I was like, "Hey cow!" and punched her face. Okay, I didn't but I wish I had she's the ugliest person like ever. I decided to go to the Gap, where this Marky Mark look-alike tried to sell me a pair of jelly sandals. Like, gag me with a spoon. "Get real," I told him. "I'd sooner wear a pair of stonewashed jeans." As it turned out, it actually was Marky Mark, and of course he asked me for a date and I said, "As if!" Marky Mark! More like Barky Bark! Anyway, later, Sharpova followed me and I decided to go for some Dip'n Dots. While in line, a gorgeously pensive Mediterranean hottie approached me, his eyes taking in every inch of my "luscious" body. Then, that ugly cow Sharpova tried talking to him! Sensing the hunk's discomfort, I screamed, "Get in line, Buckwheat, or I'll force you to watch a Gwyneth Paltrow movie!"

That stopped Unibrow in her tracks! God, I sound like Ino. But I need to. This is my first step in getting over Sasuke completely. But all my efforts were in vain because soon after my mall excursion my dad called and informed me that they were cutting off my allowance to help pay for the funeral; which meant I couldn't pay rent, which meant I needed a place- and fast, my rent was due soon. Ino? No. Something about her just screams homicide. Actually, everyone in her posse just kinda made me want to stab all of them. Move back home? Not an option. Everyone probably thinks I killed her myself. Neji? No. Sasuke's there. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. And if I haven't already made it clear enough, NO!

Five hours later

Dear Johnny Depp,

I moved in with Neji. I know I'm an idiot. I really brought the meaning of pathetic to a new level. No one would take me in and home was not an option. I'm not even sure I'm invited to the funeral. I broke so easily. I stood strong for about three hours then at eleven o'clock P.M. I knocked at their door, in my Telletubby jammers,and a bag that contained all my stuff. Then He answered. I suddenly couldn't breathe. My legs became jelly. My heart was beating loud enough for the both of us and the whole apartment complex to hear. He was God. His obsidian eyes, piercing through me like I was invisible, raven bangs framing his flawless face, the contours of his perfect body outlined in the darkness. God, I sound like a poet, but I swear he was made just for people like me to worship. I stared. He stared back.

He said, "What?"

I said "Hrrrrrrrrrrrrnnnngh."

And that's how I pretty much got here; I knocked He answered then Kiba immediately decided I would stay there forever. So here I am, writing to you in Neji's bed while that perv sleeps on the floor. I can't trust him; he's just…UGH! I'm just staying here until I can get back on my feet. Not to obsess over Sasuke. Note to self: do NOT obsess over Sasuke. But I really can't help but wonder how Sasuke looks while he's sleeping. DAMMIT! I should just stop thinking already! He's all I can think about. At least I know I'm not a lesbian. Nothing wrong with them but if I was one it'd probably be pretty icky. This will be one hell of a stay.

Sasuke's POV

I can't believe she's here. At eleven in her fricking telletubby pajamas. Have some decency, woman! Before long, she'll be dry humping my leg and digging through my trash and…jeez, she's just so irritating. I'd wish she'd just die already. And then maybe, just MAYBE I'd be able to get one waking moment where I'm not thinking of her. That girl, I swear, it's hard enough to admit this even to myself, but she'll never know what she does to me. Sakura. She's in for one hell of a stay. I'll make sure of that.

Hey guys, hang in there I have some ideas that will come through in the next chapter. I hope to get in the Naru/Saku bit a few chapters after that. Well, thanks to all my wonderful reviewers- you know who you are. I hope the last part wasn't too occ for you...I'm sorry if you hated it please don't eat me!- Lauren


	12. Lauren's Rant

I did it again...Sorry, Bluedragon212 I couldn't help it...It helps me become "pure"...Oh well, If you no likey you no read.

I'm not sure about the rest of you, but I'm tired of going into fast food restaurants and seeing little fat-kins approved menus! Go fuck yourself with a fucking loaf of bread! Stop shoving this fat-kins thing in my face! When I go get fast food, I know its bad for me, but I don't care, I like it, and I'm gonna eat it, I don't wanna have to see signs, reminding me of, how bad of a diet I'm on.

"You're not eating right, so we're gonna have to put fat-kins approved menus on there for people who want to eat an alternative healthy lifestyle."

You wanna eat an alternative healthy lifestyle? Grow some vegetables in your backyard, pick em, and eat em, and make your own damn salad! Stop cluttering up my fat filled menu, with your stupid low carb crap! Okay?

For all the dieting you people do, for all the makeovers and all that other crap that you people do to make yourselves all attractive…You're all gonna grow old, you're all gonna get wrinkles…And you will all, eventually die, so yeah, the super size fries aren't good for you, but neither are the fucking pesticides in your salad alright. So, basically we're all choosing how we're gonna die, let me kill myself in peace, okay? You fucking controlling bastards!

These are the same type of people who spew out a fact sheet of everything that's gonna go wrong with your body because you had to have the large fries. You know what? Next time someone tells you the health ramifications of the food you're eating, why don't you tell them about the health ramifications of you stabbing them in the throat? Maybe that'll shut em up, and you can enjoy your meal.

And…shifting gears for a second…why is it that every time I'm watching a commercial for a movie; some fucking critic has to call it, "riveting"? "The film is riveting!" What the fuck does that mean? Riveting? I don't want riveting! Everything is riveting to these fucking critics! And I don't give two shits if fucking…that fat bastard and that other guy, sticks his thumb up into the air! No one gives a shit if some dumb fat guy with glasses "approves, or disapproves, of a movie. Well, I thought the cinematography was quite interesting and"…Shut the fuck up!

Shut up, put your thumb down, and stop eating the popcorn! Let me watch the film first, before my head gets filled with this nonsensical critiquing from some body who just sat around his whole life, and watched movies in his house!

Just because you've seen everything, doesn't mean you understand it. Shut…up!

This guy sticks his fucking thumb in the air like he's fucking Caesar like his review means anything, to anybody, and God forbid if I come across somebody that says "well you know, they gave it two thumbs up" well you know what, here's one finger up! Okay? I'm not going to see this movie with you! You fucking bastard! Cause then, you know, you go to see the movie with this fucker, and they come out, "huh, that thumb guy was right, the cinematography wasn't so great."

Yeah, okay, then you gotta kill him with a bucket of popcorn, and you know want ensues after that…police, broomsticks, it's a whole ordeal, and you don't need that!

I'm going to the movies by myself…leave me alone!

And if there's fat-kins approved popcorn at the snack bar…I'm killing everyone!

But you know what pisses me off? You know, when you're having a conversation with someone, and for some reason, you get on a particular topic. In this case, let's say... the topic is... nuts. Don't you hate how the other person usually has to make some dumbass sexual comment creating some kind of lame-ass pun based on your legitimate topic of conversation? Let's say you say something like "I'm not sure I like those nuts, they leave a weird taste in my mouth." Then the other person, in usual dumb ass fashion, just has to say something like "Uhh, you don't like the nuts in your mouth? Hehehe." And then he or she giggles like an idiot for a half hour because they think they made a clever joke out of your topic of conversation. These people need to be killed! I'm sick and tired of people warping simple topics into something perverted. And God forbid if you're a woman who gets caught up in some kind of twisted wordplay like this. Before you know it, everyone at school or work is getting on your back because you made a comment about a large ball. It's unnecessary, it's stupid, and it just shows that you're thinking with your sexual organs rather than your brain. This being the case, someone should glue your mouth to your butt, so they may illustrate the fact that you truly, indeed, suck ass.

Next topic; drunk people! You know, the type of asshole who always has to get shitfaced on the weekend and go staggering around, patting you on the back like you're his best friend, when all you really want him to do is get in his car and drive home recklessly. I'm sick and tired of some incoherent asshole who smells like a case of malt liquor all of a sudden talking about the philosophy of life while trying to pick up some woman at a bar. Nice. And what's worse, those fucking dolts who go around and actually tell you how fucked up they got the night before; like they deserve some type of award for falling face first into a patch of tomatoes in your backyard at four AM in the morning. And don't forget, (in mocking voice) "friends don't let friends drive drunk." Screw that! As far as I'm concerned, give 'em the keys rev up the engine, and let 'em go sailing home with a bottle of taquila in their lap. One of three things will happen. 1: The cops will pull them over and end up having to beat the shit out of them, just because this fucker is in a drunken rage and refuses to turn off Neil Diamond's "They're Coming to America". Number 2: They'll wrap themselves around a telephone pole and either be killed or paralyzed. Cruel, you say? Well, so is inflicting your drunken stupidity on the rest of the world, so be ready to pay the consequences. Asshole. Scenario number 3, my least favorite: They make it home okay and pass out on the lawn with their motor running, while the radio is blasting some dumbass metal song from the mid-80's that no one wants to hear anymore. But at least it gives 'em a chance to try again next week.

So if you're a drunken moron or an idiot who has to manipulate legitimate conversations to get a cheap thrill for your libido, please feel free to get together with one another on the weekends, drive around drunk, make all the twisted sexual comments you like. And I'll just watch from the local diner window as they scrape your body off the pavement with a fucking spatula. Get out of our fucking lives, your moronic assholes. Your existence is useless, and you're dragging down the collective intelligence of humanity. (mocking voice) Don't like what I have to say? (/mocking voice) Here's the keys and a bottle of Jack Daniels. I'll see you tomorrow. But hopefully not.

**Sorry for the rant, I hope to get another chappie of I won't Cross These Streets****by Saturday or sunday. Love, Lauren**


	13. girls night in

**I won't cross these streets until you hold my hand**

Sasuke POV

There she goes again. Acting like she doesn't care about me. Acting like I don't matter to her. Who does that girl think she's fooling? She jumped into my bed this morning, pushed herself on top of me and screamed "AIEEEE! SASUKE, YOU PERVERT GET OFF OF ME! RAPE! RAPE!" Women. She's been insulting me everyday, for the past week that pink nightmare has stayed here. "Chicken head" this, "Fag-boy" that or my personal favorite, "You are a heartless bastard and wouldn't give a shit if everyone in the world died." How original. As if I hadn't heard that one a million times. And to make matters worse Neji is having a "Girls night in" to help Sakura forget about me. How the hell is that cow supposed to forget about me if I'm living in the same apartment as her?The answer to Neji was to get Sakura drunk off her ass and then try to get in her pants. Nice. First, Neji sternly told Sakura "We call it girls night in, strictly for _your _benefit all of us are _guys _and unless you'd rather have it guys night in then I suggest you don't call me a girl," he snorted "Besides, guys don't have guys night in. Unless it involves strippers and booze. But we don't call it that. We call it 'getting piss-drunk and spooning strippers'." She rolled her eyes as Neji walked in to the kitchen; he was sooo man-pmsing. Then she glued her eyes to the T.V, to watch the opening credits for "Ten things I hate about you" and also to stare at Heath Ledger's ass. Neji soon appeared with a bowl of popcorn, pop rocks, gummy bears, and some wine coolers. Essentials for getting over a hottie, like me. I watched with interest, as Sakura, the usual underage-drinking-is-against-the-law-enforcer took wine cooler after wine cooler and chugged it like it was water. Quite an accomplishment for a person who never drank anything close to alcohol in her life. Soon, she was drunk and began to run around with a pair of scissors. By the end of the movie Shikamaru was something damn near close to bald (a special girl's night in make over), Kiba's hair was now was purple, and Neji was covered in cuts, from trying to keep the pink head from chopping off his perfect hair but still trying to get close enough to her so he could take off her shirt at the same time. Fool. It's never good to try to multi task when you're almost getting killed. I watched all this from a safe distance, praying to god the drunk girl wouldn't see me and/or piss herself. She spots me. Shit.

"Chicken head! Whatcha doin' over there, buddy? Come down and drink thish shtuff with meh" She slurred, patting a empty space on the couch next to her, after throwing a very frightened Neji off it while she opened another wine cooler.

"It's Sasuke, not Chicken head and no. I won't drink with you, you're too drunk and will probably try to rape me. Then I'll have to kill you with a broken wine cooler glass." I scoffed and walked towards my room.

"Good fuck, Fag-boy I offers yous a drink and ya get all angry and thish ish what I gets? Why don't ya just crawl in a hole and die already? It's not like you're actually gonna do anything while you're alive." she wrinkled her nose angrily.

"Leave." I stop dead, in my tracks and turn around to face her." I don't need some _ugly_, drunk off her ass bitch telling me what to do. Ever since you came here all you've been doing is making things harder for everyone else. Just go away." I tell her coldly, looking in to her emerald eyes. I walk closer with ever word until we're face to face. Or in her case face to chest. Her eyes, bored in to mine. Something was different from the first time I saw them. I couldn't read them this time. They were clouded over and maybe that was because she was drunk or maybe because she was spacing out. I brought my lips to her ear

"Leave." I said. She encircled her arms around my neck and faced me, bringing my head down to her level. I'm guessing we stared at each other for at least five minutes.

"Sasuke" she said in a breathy whisper.

And that was que for her to mash her lips against mine and curl her fingers into my hair so she could strain against me as I deepened the kiss until I felt her knees go wobbly. She untangled her tongue with mine and playfully bit my bottom lip. Sakura was the first one to break off the kiss. She smirked at me, in her intoxicated state I should be the one smirking! I soon began to become bored and she started to cares my bottom lip.

"That's why I stick around. It doesn't matter how much shit you say about how much you want to leave, you kiss me like that, Sasuke, and it tells me all I needed to know." She sleepily patted my head and walked off toward Neji's room. Women.

Hey guys,

sorry I just finished writing the next few chapters and it may seem a bit rushed but I'm still happy with them. But if it bothers you then I can always add a chapter or two after. But I'm thinking of writing like an alternate ending fic for this story and the pairing is NejiSakura. So yeah, what would have happened if Sakura didn't go to Ino's party. Tell me what ya think.

XOXOXOXLaurenXOXOXOXOX


	14. Three Years later

**I won't cross these streets until you hold my hand**

Three years later

It was all going so well for her, now. A high school senior, her own place, her own car, and great friends. Despite, Sharpovas stupidity she had become one of Sakuras best friends. And even though Hinata rarely talked she also became one of Sakuras best friends. But none of them could compare to the bond that Sakura had with Kiba, Neji, and Shikamaru. Sasuke not included. After her incident before and after with him while she was drunk he was a hated enemy and he really didn't seem to mind. But that was the problem. He NEEDED to mind.

Sakura POV

I've always hated the first day of school. At first you're all excited, thinking 'Hell, maybe there'll actually be someone hot this year.' Then when you actually get there it's like 'Dammit! Another school year!' But for some reason it felt different. I could feel that this year, something that I thought was a minor thing would end up changing my life in more ways than I can count. And I was right. It did. It all started with a phone call.

"Hi! If you are Shikamaru, press 1. If you are Neji, please press 2 and if your identity is Kiba Inuzuka, press 3. Lee, if this is you, How the hell did you get my number?"

"Can I have my own number too?" A slightly familar voice asked. "I want 7."

"Oh shit, sorry about that ... Who is this?"

"Darling, don't be sorry, you're cute. It's Naruto."

"Naruto! How are you?"

"Ugh, tired. I just got off a plane and now I need someone to come pick me up."

"Where did you just fly in?"

"Funny you should mention that, I'm in Konoha-"

"I can pick you up! How soon would you like me to come get you? I'm just on my way to school and it'd really should be no problem and-"

"Now please," he interrupted. "It's weird not being here with anyone."

"Okay, I'll be ten minutes, at the max."

"Okay," he replied and then hung up. I stared at the phone as it made it's empty beeping 'no one's here anymore, moron'- sound, before hanging up as well. On the way to the airport, I got stuck in traffic and Naruto called four times with exclamations of joy that I was coming to pick him up though, apparently, I was 'taking my sweet time'. I found it disturbing that he had my cell number even though I changed my number 4 times since I moved away from my parents and Naruto just to avoid him. But it was refreshing to to talk to someone I was familar with. My dad must have given him my number. I'll kill him. I was giving a full-blown rendition of Total Eclipse of The Heart; my hands off the steering wheel (as the Cherokee remained stationary) to gesture wildly and sometimes obscenely, and my vocal chords straining as I belted out the words, fully aware my window was wound down; when everyone started moving again and the person in the car behind me honked their horn. I turned and glared at the driver before turning back around and slamming my hand down hard on my own horn. Then I had to give the police officer in the cruiser driving beside me an extremely sheepish look when he stared at me in a mixture of apprehension, astonishment, and disapproval. Thankfully, I sweetly smiled my way out of God knows what kind of fine and made it to the airport, where Naruto was standing out the front, like's we'd agreed in one of his 'hurry up' calls to me.

As usual, his blonde hair was spiky and unkempt but not quite an afro...yet; his jeans were too baggy and ripped, and his shirt was stained just above his hip as well as being wrinkled so much it looked like he'd been crumpled in to a ball the size of my brain. Mmm-hmm pretty damn small.. But, oh my god(!), he looked like he'd showered recently, and got taller and rid of that god-awful orange jumpsuit. When he saw me, a huge manic grin appeared on his face and he started bouncing up and down on the balls of his feet where his suitcase and backpack were thrown. He looked great. I stared and stared with my mouth hanging slightly opened. Drool seemed like a distinct possibility. Five minutes later I was still staring at him but for different reasons and then I pointed at the passenger seat but he just stood there, looking back and ignoring my 'get in the damn car' hints. Obviously he wanted me to get out to collect him myself. I shook my head but killed the ignition, tried to take off my seat belt (then realizing I wasn't wearing one) and got out, thinking 'he is way too used to getting his own way'.

"Heya Fugly!" I cried as I walked up to him, twirling my keys in one hand. Several people turned around to watch. He stuck his tongue out at me. What, were we five? "I'll ignore that-"

"I'm kidding," I assured him, holding up my hands and grinning.

"Well, in that case," He threw his arms wide, "C'mere sexy!"

Naruto ended up staying at my place. Kiba, Neji, and Shikamaru didn't want him at their place after the first few days he stayed there so I took him in and soon learned why they didn't want him. He was a complainer. He either stayed at home while I went to school and waited until I got home to bitch about how bored he was while I was gone or came with and bitched about how boring school was. He had the attention span of a penny. He was also crazy. He woke me up at 3:00 A.M to announce that he wanted to eat Trix. The "refreshing" part of having Naruto there was long gone and he became extremely annoying. I wasn't afraid to show it either, being mean to Naruto was something I had to do. Even if he's hot. But for some reason I can't find the heart to throw him out.


	15. Naruto

**I won't cross these streets until you hold my hand**

If I eat ramen one more time I will possibly stab EVERYONE. Naruto has officially driven me over the wall; he has to die. He's affecting my life in every way, now. He makes me angry, insane, and mean. Like for example, this morning when I slammed the door on the obese nine year old, who was selling Girl Scout cookies and told her to choke on a Thin Mint or lose some weight. But today, he drew the line. I can never go back to school again...

"Hinata!" I greeted her as I walked in the door, Naruto grumpily trailing behind.

"Oh. S-Sakura, Good M-M-M-M-Morning." She stuttered, blushing as soon as she saw the blonde dumbass.

Naruto studied her for a second.

"Hey" he said to her, nodding his head.

Hinata looked like she would faint at any moment.

"What's up with your hair?" Naruto asked Hinata randomly, breaking the silence.

"Shut the hell up." I warned him.

"I mean it's like a freaking bowl cut. And what the hell happened to your pupils? Are you blind or what?" He ignored my warning, then scratched the back of his head, Ash Ketchum style; Hinata looking very faint "But then again it must be kind of helpful like when you get stoned then your pupils won't get dilated 'cuz you don't have any so then no one can tell you burn. Wait, do you? 'cuz it's okay you can tell me." He grinned. She fainted and I kicked him in the shin. Dumbass. No wonder he's single. There was no way Sharpova was meeting him. God forbid, he asks how long it took her to grow her mustache and she eats him whole. The last thing I needed that day was to fish out a hyperactive blonde kid out of that beached whale. Yes, I know what you're thinking. Why are you so mean to her? She's one of your best buddies. And yes, that's true but that doesn't mean I don't think she's ugly. Well, Naruto meets her anyway and you know what happens. He says hi she says hi. He says something stupid she eats him. The janitor comes to scrape a very damp Naruto off the roof of her mouth and everyone continues on with their day.

"Ughhh That was so nasty." He complained, still damp and selling of sweat, fat, and moldy gummy worms.

"SHUT UP." I consoled him.

"I'm so bored. This school sucks. I hate this. No hot people and it's boring." He continued to bitch.

"Naruto! Just shut the fuck up!" I kicked his shin again.

"Oww...stop it, that hurts, ya know."

"Duh. If it didn't hurt I wouldn't do it. Now be quiet if you like having knee caps."

Naruto finally shut up. I guess he really likes having knee caps.

"Shit, We're late. Naruto hurry up!"

He looked up from the water fountain he had been drinking from. I grabbed his hand and rushed down the empty hallway and nearly collided with none other than Sasuke. He stared at me then Naruto then our hands. I quickly released Narutos hand. I could feel Sasukes coal eyes trailing back towards my face and I blushed. I mentally cursed myself! Sasuke is the enemy I hissed at inner Sakura who was once again dancing like a monkey, exclaiming that Sasuke was jealous.

"Careful. PDA isn't allowed in school. You could get in trouble. And we wouldn't want that, would we?" Sasuke whispered in my ear, as he brushed past.

"It's not PDA. I'm trying to get to class on time." I explained through gritted teeth, trying my best not to blush again. Why does my "enemy" have to be so hot?

"I'm so sure." He smirked and walked past us.

"Yeah. Naruto and I are just friends and- Hey jackass I'm talking to you!" I screamed at Sasuke as he walked away.

"Another time. I've got to get to class I don't want to be late." He said.

"Oh shit now I'm even later!" I said. Then suddenly Naruto grabbed my hand and dragged me in the opposite direction.

"YOU DOOFUS! CLASS IS THAT WAY!" I screamed, pointing in the opposite direction.

He put a finger to my lips.

"Sush. I know that. We're not going to class."

I tore my hand away.

"Well, I am."

"No, you're not." He said, very seriously, it almost scared me. Then he picked me up and went out the school entrance.

"You're going me. To Home Depot!" He exclaimed.

"I hate that place. I'm going home."

He caught my arm. "Where do you want to go then?"

"Home."

"Fine. But only on one condition. I get to sleep with you in your bed. Just like we used to. No sexual contact." He smirked.

"Dipshit, I get bruises sleeping a six _feet _away from you. Imagine what would happen if we slept together. No fucking way."

"Sakura..." He whined.

"No."

"Well, then I guess we need to go to Home Depot. Ahh, it's beautiful in there, all those chain saws and buckets of paint and screw drivers, foreign cashiers, and cement ba-"

"Hrrrnnngh."

Inner Sakura sighs.

_"YOU IDIOT! Here's your chance to finally get over Sasuke and you say hrrrnngh! Have I taught you **nothing**? And even if you do get some action it's not like you need to save yourself for Sasuke or anyone. It's a win/win situation, here"_

By this time Naruto was singing **Pretty Woman**(probably not the best choice of song since it's about a prostitute) and was on his knees.

"Fine. I trust you let's go home."

And we did.

**That night**

"Time for bed!" Naruto exclaimed, after I kicked his ass in Donkey Konga eleven times.

"Mmmm." I said, not interested, remembering the deal I made with him. I pulled back the cover, already in my pjs and climbed in the bed, Naruto followed.

"Do you think you could cook eggs on a barbeque?" He asked.

I raised an eyebrow at the randomness of the question but answered nonetheless. "Yes."

"How can you be so sure?"

"Done it before."

"What about an emu egg? Do you think you could cook an emu egg on a barbeque?"

"Isn't an emu one of those big and evil Australian birds?" He nodded and I considered. "How big do you think their eggs are?"

"About as big as The Darkness popularity should be."

"Not a fan of The Darkness, I take it? Me neither."

"Who do you think would survive if you and me both got hit by a bus - at the same time, same bus?"

"Naruto, what is with all these weird questions?"

"The same thing that's with you jumping me earlier. Now answer."

I shook my head. He made no sense what so ever sometimes.

"I grabbed your hand so you would hurry up."

"We'll get to that later but, first, who do you think would survive?"

"Me."

"I thought so. But why?"

"Because you smoke and I don't."

"That can't be the reason, scientist, I don't smoke. It just doesn't add up."

"Because Rita Hayworth can't act or because Hasslehoff is really a giraffe in disguise?"

He laughed "You are so weird Sakura."

I snuggled up to him maybe this wasn't such a bad idea. "Just because I thought Po was the purple teletubbie and not the red one doesn't mean I'm weird."

"How could you not know which one Po is?" Naruto demanded. "Po is the gay, red one - everyone knows that."

"Well, I thought he was purple and gay. You know, like Barney?" I asked.

"Don't insult Barney or I'll burn your toast tomorrow."

"You never make me breakfast." "Well, I'll start tomorrow so I can burn it."

"I just won't eat it then," I said snottily.

He gave me a serious look, the first one he'd given me in quite a while. "Sakura, if I make you toast you will eat that toast. You don't eat enough and just look at you. You're skin and bones."

I ran my hand over his ribs. "You can talk."

"Ah, but I can only talk about silly but extremely important things - like you not eating my toast."

"How long are you staying?" I changed the subject which, of course, he fell for.

"Why?" He smirked. "Do you want me to stay?"

I kissed his cheek. "Do you want to stay?"

"Of course I do." What was I saying? Naruto had to leave.

"Well then don't be a gremlin and stay." I found myself saying.

"Gremlins are the CIA's spy network of squirrels best friends."

"No, wombats are the squirrels' best friends."

"Why do we both keep on referring to Australian animals?" Naruto asked, nipping my shoulder gently.

I moaned and then pushed him away so I could answer his question _just_ _friends _I forced my to mind keep repeating that.

"I think it's because of some disease we have but I can't be sure."

He looked at me anxiously. "Well then how can we be sure?"

"By running tests."

"What sort of tests?" He asked, looking at me with all of his attention.

"First, urine samples."

"How can we be sure what the urine samples mean?"

"By having blood tests as well and seeing if our blood is still red."

"How do the urine and blood tests relate though?"

I tried to think. "Well obviously if our blood is red our piss will be yellow."

"You're a dork," he told me while pressing kisses to the inside of my elbow. He tried to pull me closer to him. "Come here."

"Naruto-"

Then the phone rang. Who the hell calls at 3 a.m? Neji. And of course it was him.

"Hello?" I gruffly answered the phone.

"Greetings and salutations, Sakura and how are we on this, fine, fine morning?" Neji cheerfully greeted me.

"Neji? Why do you call so fucking early! I live two doors down from you!"

"Because I can. Technology is a wonderful thing you should embrace it."

"Not at 3 a.m" I said, getting up out of bed then getting back in with a bowl of ice cream shifting my eyes from the bowl of melted ice cream that was my breakfast to see what Naruto was doing. His eyes didn't leave mine so I didn't notice he'd stolen some of my breakfast until I saw his finger appear infront of his face and his tongue lick all my ice cream off. I glared at him, more playful than serious, and moved my bowl out of his reach, while trying to listen to Neji.

Naruto smirked and I shuddered involuntarily when he gave me that same level of intensity in the look. It's Naruto, remember, Naruto, little innocent prankster who used to make sand castles with, I had to remind myself before looking away. He took this opportunity to scoop up some of my breakfast again to eat. I grabbed the bowl and held it away from him, high above my head. He growled and launched himself at me.

"Holy fuck!" I gasped when the ice cream spilt all over us, mainly me. We were knocked to the ground since I couldn't kept my balance with his added weight and now Naruto was hovering over ; somewhat straddling my bottom half; as he smiled victoriously down at me. I sniffed haughtily. "What are you looking at?"

"The most beautiful thing in the world covered in ice cream." He couldn't keep the cheeky grin off his face. I grinned.

"Oh, did we get Jessica Alba?"

"No, We didn't."

"Well, then I have no idea who you're talking about."

He giggled.

"Sakura, I think you should clean yourself up, that ice cream is seriously everywhere on you."

"Well who's fault is that?"

"Mine?"

"Yep, so you should clean it up - the paper towels are .."

I stopped talking when I felt something wet running across my cheek. It was Naruto's tongue.

He was licking me... I don't know why, but I suddenly couldn't breathe. It was Naruto we're talking about. Naruto. I closed my eyes for a moment and when I opened them Naruto had stopped and pulled away. He was smiling down at me.

"Weren't you talking to Neji?"

"Oh .. right," I muttered, my eyes travelling to the discarded phone. I looked back at Naruto.

"He's probably hung up already. Besides, this is much more interesting."

He looked down at me with something I couldn't read. I'd never been good with stuff like that.

"Isn't it?"

"Very."

My gaze wandered to his lips and I licked mine when I saw they had ice cream on them, just waiting to be lapped up.

"Uh, Naruto you have something on ..uh, on you.."

"So do you," he responded, leaning down and carefully licking the tip of my nose. I stared at him as he leaned his face very close to mine.

"Well, are you going to clean me off?"

My gaze became fixated on his lips as I considered if I should. The Sasuke part of me said in reminder, _friend, he's your friend_ but I didn't want to listen to it. Oh, what the hell, I thought as I leant up towards Narutos mouth. I'm horny dammit and I'm single plus, I'm supposed to be over that douche bag.

My lips almost touched his but then he sat back teasingly. My jaw dropped and I glared.

I hate him so much right now.

"I knew it!" He suddenly exclaimed triumphantly. When he saw my puzzled expression, he explained, "You've been acting weird when I first got here. You were acting so nice and then you didn't so I -"

"I have not been acting weird," I protested.

"Yeah, you have - you've been acting as if you really, really hate me. And I know why?"

Okay, now I'm interested.

"Why?"

"Sexual tension Sakura." He leant closer.

"You want to fuck me."

My mouth opened in shock and my eyes narrowed. He was so fucking crude he sounded like Neji. I decided I should try a different tactic.

"I think it's you who wants to fuck me."

Naruto squealed. "So glad you agreed," He told me before kissing my lips roughly. At first I froze in shock - I hadn't expected him to react this way. He was meant to back off, joke about it in disgusting context the next day and then forget about the incident until he decided to try it again.

Because, yes it has happened before and yes he always tries it again. But it never gets this far. And this time I did nothing to stop him.


	16. What the hell!

**I won't cross these streets until you hold my hand **

Then we were kissing. Me and Sakura. Sakura and I. It was so weird. Because, first of all, here was a girl who I've known and wanted all my life who as I far as I can remember hated me and now suddenly we're making out. So basically, several years after I've lost contact with Sakura I call her up and start living with her and we just decide to sleep together as friends and then we started macking- and she wanted it as much as I did. That's what happened, That's what I'll say on E! True Hollywood Story: Naruto. But a real kiss! DUDE! My lips on her lips, my hands entangled in her silky pink locks so I could tilt her head back just enough to dip my tounge in her mouth. She was mine. It was like those movies where the hero and heroine ride in to the sunset and live happily ever after. Except this was me and Sakura covered in melted ice cream. Whoa. This was something I could get used to. She moaned as I came up for air. I don't think I'll ever breathe properly again.

Sakura POV

Where did Naruto learn to kiss like _that_! It's pretty awkward. But I didn't have time to think- to even react as he swooped down on my lips once again. I raked his back with my fingernails.

"Sakura?"

"Oh shit."I fumbled to push Naruto away. _Doesn't anyone knock these days?_ I thought. And found myself in contact with the last person I needed to see. Sasuke. He glared coldly at me. Then faced Naruto, turned around then walked away.

"Neji was worried and told me to check up on you two. Didn't know you were fuck-buddies." He said, paused at the doorway, looking back at us, Naruto on top of me, the both of us covered in ice cream, looking like we were doing much more than what we actually were. Then he turned around, leaving me and Naruto alone once again. I stared at him. He stared back.

"You know," he said,"for every awkward silence there is another gay baby is born in to the world."

I slapped him. He was still Naruto.


	17. First date

I won't cross these streets until you hold my hand

The awkward silence seemed to pass.

"Naruto, um, so are we like a couple now or what?"

"I dunno. If sleeping with one another then licking ice cream off each other doesn't make us a couple I don't know what does." Naruto grinned.

"Hmmm... So, shall we tell the world?" I asked, raising my eyebrows.

"WHAT? You two are...g-g-going out?" Neji shrieked in a mixture of pure disgust, anguish, and suprisal. So un-Neji. Naruto's fingers intwined with mine as we both nodded.

"I didn't know you two were sleeping together." Kiba seemed excited, taking Akamaru out of his hiding place. It was obvious to him, if Sakura was sleeping with Naruto Akamaru would be safe.

"Milk." Shikamaru stated, making everyone think _what a fuckng dumbass_.

"Hn." Sasuke acknowledged everyone in the room as he walked in.

"Uchiha! Did you know Forehead is sleeping with Dipshit?" Neji inquired, pointing first to me then to Naruto.

_"_Yeah. This morning they were fucking like rabbits." Sasuke sneered at us. He looked angry, maybe even a little, dare I say it, jealous? Neji gasped at Sasuke's crude comment, he looked ready to pass out.

_"We _fucked like_ rabbits_!_" _I exclaimed, in disbelief and disgust.

"Sakura, despite how cute rabbits are, those animals are sex machines! Ever wonder how they reproduce so fast?"

I slapped his head. "No, you dope! Forget the rabbits_, we **NEVER **_fucked _ever_!"

_"_Ice cream and all that kinky shit." Sasuke added, going over the "details" with Neji, paying no attention to me and Naruto's conversation.

"IT WAS AN ACCIDENT!" I screamed.

"So that's why he was on top of you, licking all of it off?" Sasuke took a step closer.

I turned to Sasuke _"_Go to hell!" I screamed. I grabbed Narutos hand and ran out the door. Each step sounded like it was saying Sasuke_. Sasuke Sasuke Sasuke_ I tried to drown it out by screaming inside, in my mind. But my steps were always louder and more clear than what I was thinking. _Sasuke Sasuke Sasuke. _His name was the only thing my mind could register. The worst part of it all was that Naruto held my hand through the whole thing, having no idea what was going on in my head.

Blue or Yellow.

God just has to make me choose. Naruto was the obvious choice. He was hot, funny, and not an asshole. Sasuke, on the other hand was also hot but also an asshole and homocidal. Naruto tapped my shoulder gently, bringing me back to the living world.

"Sakura? Um, I know you kind of aren't feeling too good but I was wondering if, uh, you, um wanted to go out on a..." His voice trailed off.

"A date?" I offered, happy to leave my thoughts.

"YES! I mean, yeah a date." He tried to regain composure.

"Sure."

He grinned like a jack-o-lantern and ran to the car, dragging me with him.

"Why are we at Safeway?" I asked.

"Grocery shopping." He answered simply.

"Get in the cart." He said suddenly.

"What? No way!" I slapped his hands away from carrying me in to the cart. But that was all in vain because he did anyway.

"Now, isn't this fun?" Naruto smiled, walking down the asile looking at the "great selection" of yogurt which contained flavors like Strawberry, Orange, and Green. If you consider green a flavor. "No. You look like a freaking pedophile and I'm calling the date rape hotline on your ass." I said.

"Wheee. Such fun, I wish someone would push me in a cart." Naruto laughed nervously, not sure if I was joking or not.

"I could give you a push" said a male prostitute in a neon pink g-string, winking at Naruto, then patting the empty space next to the "king sized" bottle of lube he had in his shopping cart. In return, Naruto zoomed down to the check out, screaming "NOT IN THE BUTT!"

I guess we didn't need any groceries.

"I can't believe they let..._that _in the store." He manged to gasp out.

"What happened to the no shoes, no shirt, no service policy?" He wondered aloud.

"Well, they let you in, they let everyone in." I suggested. He grinned and kissed me.

"I guess you're right." He said, coming up for air.

This counts as a date right?

**Hey, ya'll! I updated. Do you like it? I'm happy with it. So yeah, tell me what you think. Oh and check out my new fic, Headfirst for halos. **

**Love, **

**AsianOne**


	18. Knock first

I won't cross these streets until you hold my hand

"I'll be right back," Naruto assured me, "I'm just going out for some more ice cream. We ran out because of what happened early this morning." He grinned. I nodded seriously.

"Godspeed, young traveler. May the great lords of the frozen good section in Walgreens shine mercifully in your favor." I smiled at him. He kissed my cheek and ran out the door. Ahhh, young love. I bounced, yes, bounced to the sink and started to turn on the water to wash my hands.

"Sakura."

I jumped nearly ten feet in the air.

"Good fuck, you scared me half to death..." I turned around. "Sasuke." I slowly finished the sentance.

"Why are you even here?" I asked, angrily.

He sighed and forced himself to look at the ground "To apologize." He said forlornly.

"Well, why don't we make both our lives easier by, you apologizing to me then I'll say get the fuck out of my place then slam your head in to my coffee table and after that you can never come anywhere near a ten mile radius close to me." I snapped at him.

He glared at me

"Do you know how hard it is for me to say sorry to you? You should be thankful I'm even _talking_ to you" He spat, angrily.

"Oh yes, I'm so blessed to have the great Sasuke speak to me." I said, sarcastically.

"You don't even like _him_. He doesn't even _know _you." His words stabbed at me. It was the way he said it. _Him, _he said it with such contempt.

"Well, if you know me so well why don't you tell him then." I spat back at him. He looked quiet for a moment. Then he took a deep breath. The kind of breath you take when you finally say something you wanted to get off your chest for a long time. Then he spoke.

"I'll tell him that you hate cashews, are allergic to peanuts but spend thirty dollars a month just to export macadamias from Australia. You don't mind almonds but only if they're in nougat."

I opened my mouth but closed it when he stepped closer to me. I just leaned on the sink and watched him.

"Does he know your favourite color is still pink even though you tell people it's blue? How about when you cried because The Spice Girls broke up -does he know that? No?"

I shook my head. So what if Naruto didn't know my favorite nut or my favorite color or my allergies?

"Complete sentances, Sasuke? GOOD JOB! Before you know it you'll be potty trained too." I tried to sneer but somehow I couldn't. But Sasuke didn't seem to notice he just continued to talk.

"Does he know that you're scared the mole on your back, on your left shoulder blade-the one you think no one knows about- is going to change and you'll have cancer like your cousin , Freddy, did when you were just five years old? Or that you worst fear is drowning - that you'd rather burn to death than drown? Or that your 'proof' God is male is that women are the ones who go through periods, childbirth, and PMS? Does Naruto know that?"

We both smiled but then he moved forward still. How did he know all this? But maybe the better question is why, why did he care? WAIT...Did Sasuke just SMILE! Hot damn.

"Is Naruto even aware that you have exactly three crinkles at the corner of both your eyes when you smile? Or that your nose wrinkles up when you yawn? I hope he's realized how you look like a cat when you stretch. And that you bury your face in the pillow when you're asleep - almost as if you know I - you're being watched."

"Sasuke, you're kind of creeping me-" I was cut off by him, all the venom from my voice was gone, leaving it soft and utterly harmless.

He stopped directly in front of me, never breaking eye contact not even once.

"I bet Naruto doesn't even know exactly how sweet you are, or exactly how kind, or especially exactly how much of a dork. But he probably knows how beautiful you are even if all that other stuff doesn't matter at all to him..." His voice trailed off.

I tried to look away but I couldn't. Blood rushed to my face, my palms insisted on sweating and my heart was thudding loud enough to echo through my whole apartment. I never knew he cared. He leant forward and, surprised, I almost pulled away. But I didn't because I knew that any actions I'd make after what he'd said would be clumsy and let him know how I still feel about him.

"Can he make you blush like that?"

"No" I whispered, half to myself, half to him.

Then he captured my lips with his and Naruto walked in. Moral of the chapter? KNOCK!

**Hey guys! Ya, very unlike Sasuke but I kinda like it so if you don't then THAT'S TOO BAD CUZ I AIN'T CHANGING IT.**

**(What is typed below is Mindless raving, and is an optional read. You have been warned) **

**So yeah, this chappie is based on what happened to me today. So yeah this really hot guy named Bradley said stuff similar to what Sasuke said. Let me explain Brad was this really ugly white kid when I first met him in pre-k. He always had a thing for asians. So I was all Ms. Bitchola on his ass because he liked me, hence he always would bug me and choose me for his partner,etc, etc and was extremely ugly. Yes, I'm a superficial bitch. Deal with it. So fast forward to present time. I liked his best, really hot, friend named Jack. Brad was all mean to me when I told him so then today I bugged Brad for the millionth time to get me his e-mail because Jack moved and lives in California. Then he got all pissy and finally gave a (similar to Sasukes') I've-kind-of-been-stalking-you-for-a-couple-of-years speech. It was nice in a weird way. I was on cloud nine for hours. He's hot _and _psycho. Something we have in common. Ahhhh. And yes, I am a twinkie (asian on the outside white on the inside) **

**A very happy,**

**AsianOne **


	19. Naruto needs a hug, Neji needs a beer

**I won't cross these streets until you hold my hand**

She broke away from Sasuke.

"No way." I said, looking from her to Sasuke, dropping the ice cream, I bolted out the door. I got in to her car and revved up the engine to her Cherokee. Yes, I believe that is called auto theft. But she _cheated_. Cheated with _him. _

'It's not like you expected this to work out. You saw how she looks at him. She ain't in to you. So what? Suck it up, you pussy!' says the first voice.

'Naruto, I know you're hurt but you knew deep down this was going to happen. Well, look at it this way. You never really were together. Offically, you two were a couple for 4 hours.' Says the second voice.

I can't understand the third voice because he only speaks Mexican. I use my voice of reason to help translate. Voice of reason comes up with the best comfort: 'You don't need her. Just drink until you pass out.' So that's what I did. Found a college frat party and drank until John Travolta resembled something like Kate Moss. Yeah, that's right pretty damn drunk.

Neji POV

"I dun need 'er she's justa 'oldin' meh backk" Naruto slurred.

I sighed. God, he's such a dumbass. If anything Sakura was the best thing for him.

"Yes, you don't need her." I roll my eyes, trying to humor him. Maybe then he'll stop talking, While wondering for the millionth time how exactly Naruto got to this party.

"I coulda gotta 'nyone I wantted. I could gggett any one." He chugged down some more tequila.

"Mmmm..." I said, uninterested.

"Like that one gggirlie overs there." he pointed in the direction of a tree.

"Naruto, that's a tree." I remind him.

"Naw, the chick next to it." He nodded to her. I looked over in that direction. _Eduardo _read her name tag. Hmmm, a name tag? A hooker, perhaps?

"Naruto, that's a man. "Her" name is Eduardo. Like Edward." I argue.

"Nott evennn, it's fancy for Edwina. Ya know dem hookers and dere fancy pants names."

"Naruto, she has seven o' clock shadow."

"Aw, shome racesh have morrre of theee facial hair den de othersh" He winked at "her".

" 'She' has an adams apple." I pointed out.

He squinted at her, fell flat on his face, and forgot our whole she-is-actually-a-he conversation.

"Heyyyzz" He called to it.

"Hey big boy, wanna have a good time?" Eduardo purred, clinging to his arm. I shudder as "she" winks at me and blows me a kiss mouthing a quick 'call me' before attempting to suck face with Naruto.

God, I need a beer.


	20. umm

I won't cross these streets until you hold my hand

At 7 a.m. Naruto calls.

"Hey. I'm um, in jail can you come and uh get me?" He manageed to say, sounding seriously hung over.

"Yeah, sure." I whispered in to the phone, it felt like something I had to do. After what I put him through, I at least ought to bail his ass out of jail.

When I saw him I was surprised, grossed out, and annoyed at the same time. I was surprised, and grossed out, because he was wearing only his boxers and a quarter sleeved plaid belly shirt. He looks like he slept with a trucker mom. I was really annoyed, because it was 7 a.m. When people, such as I, are still sleeping. Not bailing out hung over blondes sitting in a jail cell next to a gay biker who had a tatoo that was supposed to say "Mom" but read "Mo". I am Sleeping.

"Um hey, Sakura." he gave a weak grin as the she-cop opened the cell and let me in.

"What happened?" I asked, sitting next to him on the cold bench covered with graffiti, "why are you here?"

"Frat party. Underage drinking, hookers, disturbing the peace or something like that. The cops came and that's when shit went down."

"..." I wanted to say I was surprised. But I wasn't.

He chuckled, wincing after each spurt of laughter, _very _hung over. "They had to taser me like five times, practically soak my eyes with pepper spray, use ten pairs of handcuffs, and a banana just so I would get in the car."

"That's very interesting."I said, unamused and tired.

"On the bright side, I think I'm married to twelve hookers, seven male strippers, and a duck."

"Wow, Naruto you're getting more ass than a toilet seat." I punched his arm lightly.

"Yeah, but Sakura I think we really need to, uh, talk."

"Ya think?"I said sarcastically, not a morning person.

"Um yeah. I do."

"I was being sarcastic."

"Whatever, I'm just going to get to the point. Last night I saw you and Sasuke...and well, you were doing something you don't with other guys while you're in a relationship with someone else. So yeah, I was really mad and everything," he paused and looked away, "So I got drunk at this frat party with Neji and tried to convince myself I didn't need you, but I was wrong. I do need you." He lifted up the sleeve of the plaid piece of shit, "And this tatto proves it."

He grinned hugely.

"Naruto, it says Eduardo. Why did you sleep with a man?" I spat flatly, a little pissed that Naruto, who supposedly loved me has a tattoo of a guy's name.

"Why does _everyone _say that? Eduardo. Edwina. It's the same. It's just an ethnic thing. Eduardo is a girl, I assure you."

"Are you sure?" I said in a haughty voice.

"YES! I have never been more sure in my life."

"Are you sure you're sure?"

"You know what? I-I don't know! I think she is!"

"But you slept with her you should know."

"I didn't _sleep _with her- or whatever Eduardo is I was too drunk, okay?" Naruto insisted.

"Ugh. Whatever."

"But seriously, this is a sign that we're meant for each other! It's a sign!"

"It's name of the male hooker you made out with." I remind him

"To forget about you. But I couldn't. I even got a tattoo of its name and I couldn't get you out of my head. "

"What the fuck?"

"Sakura, we're meant to be together, seriously!"

"Please, stop talking." I distanced myself from him and told him to fuck off before I chop his balls off as nicely as possible.

"You and me, Sakura, WE'RE MEANT TO BE!" He screamed.

I jog out of the cell and close the gate in his face. He looks pathetic as he clings to the metal bars and starts to song "Summer Lovin'" from the movie Grease. Gay Biker thourghly checked out Naruto's ass and looked very happy. Singing songs from Grease in a jail cell with a gay biker preparing to give you a ass raping while your girlfriend is a cheating pms-ing bitch and somehow she's the one pissed off and leaves without bailing you out isn't the best thing that could happen to a guy, I realized. But the real sad thing is, is that I don't care.

**Sorry I didn't update sooner. Busy like HELL! Anyway, so yeah I just went out with Bradley and my other friends to the mall. He's so adorable but has no idea how the computer works, much less his own brain. He's kind of like a puppy but more of a dumbass. OH GOD! I JUST MADE OUT WITH A PUPPY! OH GOD!AHH! Okay, not puppy. Just a really dumb, hot, sweet guy. Sorry! I'm bragging and being so uhhh immature! ahh Asshole! I'm being like a huge asshole! I'm being so Oh lookit me I have a hot boyfriend. I hate when people do that I'm sorry I'm doing that to you guys. I think I'll have like a special side story just because it's the big 20. this chappie is dedicated to all you who review!**


	21. Neji POV

**I won't cross these streets until you hold my hand**

_Hi! Sorry for the late update I hope you enjoy this chapter even though the Sasu/Saku will come in the next chappie. Sorry Saskura-chan. Thanks everyone, reviewers one and all! I have like 80 something reviews! Its fricken sweet!-Love, AsianOne_

"Hey, Blondie ya got a visitor" the lady-cop told Naruto, munching on a donut. So stereotypical cop. Naruto looked up at me, shivering I guess spending the night in jail next to a gay biker trying to play butt darts with him wasn't exactly his idea of fun.

"Naruto" I said.

His left eye twitched.

"Oh god why? Oh god why? OH GOD WHY!" he kept repeating.

"Rough night?" I asked.

Naruto nodded, the biker looking suspiciously content.

"I've come to collect your ass so we can go back home." I said.

The biker grinned wickedly at Naruto, "You probably don't want to collect his ass after what I've done to it," he turned to glare me (assuming I was Naruto's boyfriend) and grabbed Naruto's crotch (A/n this is rated M for a reason ya know)"THIS IS MINE!" he declared, squeezing Naruto in the lower region of his body, Naruto kicking and screaming.

"Um, yeah I'm not gay." I reassured the biker, backing away a couple, say, HUNDRED yards.

The biker resumed his content look and went to lie on his bunk. Naruto, traumatized greatly, shivering and twitching.

"Naruto why is _Eduardo _tattooed on your arm? You do know that Eduardo is probably a guy, right?" I asked.

"EDUARDO IS A GIRL!" Naruto screamed, trying to console himself, I guess having two guys, one of which boned his ass is enough to make him insane.

"Don't worry Naruto, having a penis doesn't affect someone's ability to be a good person. It just makes it less likely. I'm sure if Eduardo is as good as you say he-she-whatever it is you guys would have a great relationship." I said, trying to make him feel better.

"Well, excuse me for not knowing how to work 'do you have a penis' in to a conversation!" Naruto said, angrily. But the biker looked angrier.

"YOU'RE CHEATING ON ME! BLONDIE, DO YOU THINK THIS IS A GAME! THIS ISN'T A MOTHERFUCKING GAME! BITCH, DON'T MAKE ME GIT THE WHIP!" The biker screamed. I ran out of the cell as fast as I could.

"SORRY, NARUTO CAN'T HELP YOU THERE! I TRIED!" I hollered as I ran out of the police station. I'll so need therapy after this.

_Yeah, short chapter. So I guess this is the little short side story but it doubles as a chapter because I'm lazy and want to get off the computer and go make out with Bradley! Go me! Sorry. You probably didn't want to hear that. Well, I hope you don't hate me too much I'll make the next chapter VERY long and lots of sasu/saku fluff. XOXOXOXAsianOneXOXOXOX_


	22. Neji and the Therapist

**SHORT STORY**

_Hey guys, I decided to write a short story anyway. I promise I'll be working on the 'new long chapter' as soon as possible. I just felt that if you guys have been sticking around and reading this fic for 21 chapters you really do deserve some kind of reward so here it is: Neji's visit to the therapist's office (based on one of my experiences with **my** therapist). I might think of turning this in to a spin off series if the reviews are good. Thanks! You guys Kickass!-AsianOne_

"So you're Neji Hyuuga, correct?" said the receptionist.

He nodded and flashed a smile, his pearly whites gleaming at the brooding receptionist sitting inside the small mental health clinic. After an incident with a certain blonde and a gay biker, therapy was the least Neji could do to recover from all the emotional damage that event caused him. Or at least that's what his last therapist said, and shortly after saying that he tried to hit on Neji. So here he was, in another clinic.

"Doctor Brown will be seeing you now, Mr. Hyuuga." The receptionist said glumly.

Neji expected her to follow up that statement with an 'I hate my job' but she just opened the door into the doctor's office and shoved him in.

"Ahhh, Neji, come, sit, sit. I've been looking forward to meeting you. I'm Doctor Brown" The man balding man with eyebrows that looked suspiciously like Satan's said, patting a recliner next to him.

"Ummm…Okay." He said, sitting down, nervous at the fact that Satan-eyebrows was "looking forward" to meeting him.

"Neji, I've come to understand that you are going through some emotional distress after an instance where you witnessed a close friend of yours was getting touched by another man in a sexual way." The therapist said eying the portion of Neji-meat put before him.

"Um…yeah I'm not very comfortable talking about this right now…"Neji's voice trailed off, moving slightly over to go hang out with the wall.

"Right, sorry, Neji I respect your wishes. So Neji, have you ever wanted to be of the opposite sex?" the therapist asked, lips pursed, one Satan-eyebrow raised.

"Uh no."

"You can tell me, Neji. That's why I'm here." Dr. Brown assured him.

"I don't want to be a girl and I never have."

"Okay, that's good." Dr. Brown mumbled, scribbling furiously on his notepad, "so, Neji if you don't mind me asking, do you like small animals?"

"Um…I guess."

"Do you like them a lot?"

"They're okay"

"Okay, so have you ever tried hurting small animals?"

"If I liked small animals why would I hurt them?"

"You said they're okay. Besides, I like cows, Neji but that doesn't stop me from eating them. I will repeat the question again: have you ever tried to hurt small animals?"

"No!"

"Is that so?" more scribbling, "Neji, do you ever have dreams where you are bigger and stronger than everyone else?"

"Um I guess?"

"Hmmm…" Dr. Brown pauses to look up at him, "and in these dreams do you hurt small animals?"

"NO! OKAY? NO! IN FACT, I LOVE SMALL ANIMALS! JUST STOP ASKING ABOUT THE FUCKING ANIMALS!" Neji screamed.

"Okay, so you like the small animals." Dr. Brown paused for a moment, "Neji, have you ever thought about kissing the small animals?"

"FUCK NO!" Neji screamed, boiling red.

"Neji, I just want you to know denial is the first step in to getting better. When you're ready to talk I just want you to know I'm here for you." Dr. Brown paused and looked in to Neji's eyes, "Has anyone ever told you, that you have beautiful eyes?" he said.

Neji screamed and ran out of the office, the receptionist sighing heavily. Note to self: More therapy for Neji Hyuuga was her only thought.


	23. Sassaku flufff

**I won't cross these streets until you hold my hand**

**Sorry for the late update, everyone. Been busy and shit has been happening. I broke up with Bradley. No biggie. He was just the guy I made out with, a mouth with a guy attached to it. I'm sorry if that sounds mean but if he wasn't hot and athletic he would have nothing going for him. I mean number one he's a retard, number two he's constantly telling me 'Christian is sooooo ugly' which is not true. Christian is shmexy. And three he's like gay or something. He's more interested in my SHOES than making out with me. His friend once told me:; Brad must be gay if he's not trying to get in your pants I laughed off then but now I'm full on believing it. So I had to break up with him:**

**Me:Um it's not me it's you. Oh fuck, wait, um can I start over? Brad: what? **

**Me: Dammit, Bradley , you dumbass I'm breaking up with you. **

**Then he shrugged, tripped over a tree root, fell on his butt and left me standing there, while I tried not to laugh. So now he shaved his head became fugly and is going out with some poser emo chick that hisses and brags about how she cuts her thumb. She's like Gollum with large amounts of nose hair. Yeah, Brad, thank you for proving my theory on you being gay. So now I'm living the single life, denying that I had anything to do with _anyone _named Brad. I'm not really sad we broke up. He was just a nice piece of ass to look at and mack but all my friends (except Christian) made a big ass deal about it. We're 12, my god, it's not like we were going to get married or like I'm carrying his child, jeez. Anyway, that's my excuse for not updating sooner. Oh and, in this fic there will be a LEMON! Well, in the near future. But seriously, how awesome is that! And it's guaranteed to kick ass because I'm not writing it. Bluedragon212's boyfriend, Josh is writing it. He's really good at those. He already e-mailed the first part and it's starting out really good. Thanks, Josh, you're awesomely awesome, if you're reading this, but I'm still _not _giving you a blowjob. Seriously. Anyway, as I promised, a long chapter with SasuSaku fluff.**

I slowly walked back to my apartment only to find, right outside the complex, Shikamaru lazily lying on a small patch of grass, staring at the sky.

"Hey" Shikamaru lazily greeted me.

"Hi," I said, flopping down next to him, "Watcha doing?"

"Looking at the clouds..." he eyed the sky dreamily.

I sighed and stared up at the sky also.

"Shikamaru I need some advice" I finally said.

_Asking for help is the first step in Shikamaru's eight step program to help **you **get over a certain dark haired hottie_ Inner Sakura said, disgusted at me _If you really need advice, dumbass, you ask Dear Abby, not the stoner who lives a couple apartments down. _

I felt it necessary to remind Inner Sakura that Dear Abby not only cramped my style but half the shit she says never works. Inner Sakura rolled her eyes and pouted. _Whatever_ she huffed.

"Choose love."he immediately_ s_aid.

"Um...I haven't told you my problem yet."

"Look within..." He said gravely.

"What the hell? How can you say these things when I haven't told you my problem?"

"Know yourself." was his answer.

I thought for a moment.

"The answer, my friend is blowing in the wind" he closed his eyes and nodded thoughtfully.

"Fuck you" I said, walking away, to the park, frustrated.

"Yes...Go follow your soul..."I heard his dead pan voice float off in the wind.

I've always loved the park. Ever since I was little; I would bask in the pleasures of pushing all the other sissy kids off the swing sets, stealing the fat kid's ice cream cones and cheating at hide-and-go-seek. But as I grew older I loved the park for different reasons. It was so calm. So relaxing. So anti-Sasuke. I sat down on a wooden graffiti covered, admiring how barren the park was today.

"Hey."

I turned around. Neji. Of course.

"Hi Neji, give me some advice before I throw up on you." I said.

Neji rolled his eyes, "How can I help you?" He huffed.

"It's Sasuke and Naruto..."I trailed off.

"They're gay together?"

"No, which do I chose?"

"Um, Sakura you can't chose _either _if they're in love. I won't let you!"

"No, you fucktard they are _not _in love. _I'm_ in love with _both_ of them."

"You mean, Sasuke" he corrected.

"What?"

"You're in love with Sasuke." he snorted in obvious disapproval.

"No I'm not! I love Naruto!"

"Okay, then chose Naruto." he said blankly.

"But what about Sasuke? Hello? I love Sasuke. _Anyone _who's a notch over brain-dead can see that, dumbass."

"But you said-" he started, "Nevermind choose Sasuke," he paused and rubbed his temples, "You're probably not going to want Naruto after what that gay biker did to him."

I cringed, "I don't even want to know"

His left eye twitched and he began to shiver and scream "NOT IN THE BUTT". Now where have I heard that before? I fled, my eyes widened as I climbed in to the jeep, away from the man-woman that we all like to call Neji.

I've decided. I choose Sasuke. Yes, Regis, that is my final answer. Deal with it.

'How? How would I tell him?' I thought, walking in to their apartment, 'I can't just say, Oh hi Sasuke, remember the last time we made out? Well, I've been thinking about the two of us and now that Naruto is in jail and is probably getting ass raped by a gay biker **again **do you want to go out sometime? Breakfast, maybe lunch, maybe dinner, maybe **anytime of any fucking day**. '

I shook my head and sighed. How homosexual is this? I couldn't get him back. He's _Sasuke_. _Sasuke_. Need more advice, and I'm getting desperate because _now _I'm going to ask _Kiba. _

"_Laxative, Laxative, why you gotta be so flaxative? Ya make me wanna take a poop in my brand new cadalaxative, Motherfucka!_" Kiba "rapped" to Gaylord, their pet fish. He looked down at the goldfish lovingly.

"Do you like it, babe? I wrote it just for you?" he smiled tenderly, at him.

Gaylord looked at him funny, like a what-the-hell-is-wrong-with-you look.

"I'm glad you like it, honey. You see, it's a symbolic rap about life on the street. It was so painful to rap about reality, sweetie. It really is."

Gaylord swam to the other corner of the fish bowl, away from Kiba.

_Just don't make eye contact and you'll be fine! _Inner Sakura screamed to Gaylord.

"Aww, honey, why you gotta do me like that?"

I cleared my throat.

Kiba gasped.

"AHHH! IT'S NOT WHAT IT LOOKS LIKE!"

I shook my head. Dear Abby here I come. I'm back to square one.

"Shit, baby I said I'm sorry what else do you want me to do?"

A long pause.

"WHAT! BITCH, I SUPPORT THIS FAMILY! I IS LEAVING YOU, MASTA FELIX WAS RIGHT; I SHOULD HAVE KEPT MY HO ON A LEASH!" Kiba screamed, as he stomped out in to the living room, plopping down next to me.

"Gaylord is a boy fish" I said quietly.

His eyes narrow.

"BITCH! YOU DUN BEEN LYING TO ME FOR TEN YEARS! TEN YEARS! AND YOU NEVA EVEN TOLD ME YOU IS A GUY! THAT IS JUST FUCKED UP! YOU SAID 'GAYLORD' WAS YOUR COVER NAME!"

Gaylord then committed suicide and Kiba had to clean his bowl. I shook my head in dismay, Kiba is such an idiot. I slowly walked toward my own apartment. The door was open. Naruto must have gotten home somehow. Weird. I hope he didn't bring home the biker. Ugh. That'd be just nasty.

"Naruto I'm home."

He grunted, lying on my bed, body encased in sheets, the upper half of his head underneath a pillow. I jumped on top of him. Another grunt.

"Wake up, sleepy head. This is my bed and since you just slept with a gay biker you're not allowed in it."

His upper lip twitched. I frowned. Since when did Naruto's lips look so delicious? I leaned foreword and gave him a kiss, soft and innocent at first, lips on lips, moving here and there, gently forceful. Then it became frantic and needy as his tongue probed my mouth, while I nibbled at it, sometimes my own tongue danced with his. I shoved the pillow out of his face and entangled my fingers in his hair, both of his hands on my cheeks, my eyes closed as I kissed him back, with all the passion I could muster. Finally, we broke off for air.

"Wow Naru-" I stopped myself when I realized it wasn't him. It was Sasuke.

"This is really awkward."

He just stared at me his hands still on either side of my head, looking like the god he is. His pale skin, dark eyes, jet black hair, were highlighted as the rays of the sun illuminated his strong features to their best advantage. There were a million things I wanted to say but none of them could escape my lips. Even if they did it would just be a jumble of meaningless words that neither of us could even _begin _to comprehend. That'd make me look stupid. Stupider than how I look now. Something, I could do without.

So we just stared at each other like the first time I saw him. He finally opened his mouth to speak, his eyes never leaving mine.

"That's why I stick around. Doesn't matter how much shit you throw at me, you kiss me like that, Sakura, it tells me all I need to know."

The fucker stole my line.

**Was it fluffy enough! Well, sorry if it wasn't. This chapter is dedicated to everyone who reviews, Johnny Depp, and to the memory of my goldfish, who recently committed suicide, Gaylord (that's how I got the idea). Anyway, I've been busy so really sorry to keep you all waiting. I've also been distracted with my other stories; I've been writing chapters for those too. Yeah, so always check my profile for updates, on what is up with the stories, if it's on hold or what not. Well, yeah if you have any questions send me a message or add me on MSN. **


	24. Lebians, Left shoes, and Johnny Depp

**I won't cross these streets until you hold my hand**

**NOTE TO CHADLEY**

**Well, Chadley, I hope you're happy with yourself. You made Christian cry. Now, I'd rather have sex with Jon Voight (who is like Angelina Jolie with saggy old man boobs) than see you. That's how much I hate you now. You left a really mean "Annonymous" message to me and Christian. I know it was you because it was signed B-rad. The only person who calls you B-rad is yourself. You can say all the shit you want about me but not to Christian. You know as well as I do that she's infatuated with you. Just because she really likes you doesn't mean you have the right to trample all over her feelings. You know she'll never get mad at you or want revenge so you use her to vent. Look, you asshole, Christian puts her whole heart in to everything; and she does it for you and you have the nerve to tell her she's ugly. You tell her she's stupid; that she doesn't have the right to exist. But you know what? Christian is the sexiest beast this side of sexy beast land. Christian is smarter than you'll ever be. Why do you hate her so, much anyway? She hasn't done anything to you besides worship the freaking ground you walk on. Is it because she won't dress like a skank or wear make-up that makes her look like Bozo-the-fucking clown like almost every girl you've dated? Maybe you hate her because she's too good for you. Because if you hate her because of this reason, for once you're almost right. She does deserve better. Or maybe you hate her because she knows she doesn't have to change the way she is for some stupid kid. She knows that there is more to beauty than looks. But Christian, she's beautiful in her own way. In fact, in every way. If I were a lesbian I'd want to _date _her. And FYI, Christian can be so pretty. But she chooses not to. She's happy being her. And thanks, to you you've destroyed that. Happy, now asshole? You've made her misreable. Fuck you. **

_**Sorry guys, this needed to be said. A certian bitch named Bradley(AKA Chadley)sent a really horrible message to us. It hurt Christian so much. I love Christian like a sister and I hate to see her sad. So if you would be so kind and review this chapter with something nice to say about Christian that'd be too cool. I know there isn't a lot you know about her but I just want to tell you she really is the backbone of this fic. The king sized bottle of lube? Christian's idea. Naruto in jail? Also her idea Sakura's drunken speech? I think you know who thought of that one. She is really bummed about that message so just write a few nice things about her. Thanks** **for understanding-Lauren **_

Dear Johnny Depp,

Sasuke was in my bed. Sasuke was in my bed. Sasuke was in my bed. Sasuke was in my bed. Sasuke was in my bed. And finally, Sasuke was in my bed. Sasuke also ate all the filling out of my oreos and left all the cookies scattered around the kitchen table. Not good. Not good at all. I kissed Sasuke. I kissed Sasuke. I did. I liked it more than I realized at first. Not good. Not good at all. I tried to tell him off, Johnny, I really did. I tried to get my angry face, and be in take-no-prisoners mode because he invaded my space. But I couldn't. I wanted to say:

"GET YOUR UNGRATEFUL ASS OUT OF MY BED!" but I pronounced some things wrong and it ended up sounding like: "Willyougooutwithmesometime?Like,sayNOW!"

As it turned out, he was drunk and he said Yes, I'd love strippers. So I somehow got drunk too. I don't know what happened after that, really. I just remember the cops, Eddie Murphy, and a very bad joke on a piece of Laffy Taffy. So, I'm writing this to you on a Kleenex from jail while the bearded lesbian in Birkenstocks who I'm sharing a cell with tries to eat my shoe. I'm hoping it will hold her off long enough so I can figure out a plan that involves me not getting raped and having ten million of Sasuke's children. Oh, my hung-over mind! She's devoured both my shoes and is moving on to my socks! When will the torture end! All my dreams of the perfect plan, all the mini-Sasuke's, the Sasuke planet, the army of little Sasuke's. It all breaks in to a billion fruity pebble sized pieces. I expected that, though. Dreams don't exactly have a reputation of coming true. I have a feeling that if they did, we would live under the rule of Oprah, worship Tom Cruise, and Conan O'brien would have hair. I'm afraid I don't have much time to live as a straight person anymore. The bearded lady ate my left sock and is still deciding whether to eat the other sock or my tube of lip gloss. That bitch better not choose the lip gloss. That shit is expensive. Johnny, I'm afraid our time is going to be cut short; the lesbian is approaching the lip gloss. I just want you to know, my last request as a straight woman. It is to find someone who knows me to read this. And if I'm a hippie-lesbian who doesn't shave and sports hiking boots and gardening gloves, while selling organic smoothies out of a flower clad mini van, polluted in that incense crap to cover up the smell of all the weed me and my dyke-a-delic girlfriend have been smoking, while fighting for the rights of trees, tell them password is: Wendy's. Just say it and I'll be back to normal.

**_Thanks for reading. RR please! Review whore alert! _**


	25. The Jerk

**I won't cross these streets until you hold my hand**

Day two with the lesbian. After living with guys for a brief stint and a day with dyke woman I've already picked up some of their language.

"Ugga Ugga hiking boots Ugga Ugga!" I said in broken lesbian. I'm hoping it means don't rape me or take me to your leader. Perhaps we can come to an agreement of some sort. Like them not coming near me and me throwing them lip gloss. That works for me.

She shrugged. "Ugga Ugga Me hungry!"

I don't need to like other girls to figure that one out. I'm running out of lip gloss. Oh Lord, have mercy! When I get drunk I only have a limited amount of lip gloss offhand. I'm too young to be eaten by a lesbian! I mean, really, I'm not even legal. I'm going to die a virgin. But if she does eat me she at least has to shave first. So unsanitary, lesbians nowadays. Beards are so full of germs. Ick. It's called a razor, sasquatch! Come on!

Life is a bitch. And when you finally accept that she has puppies. In my case, jail life is a lesbian and when I accepted it, it ate all my lip gloss. In other words, the worst day ever gets worse. I heard it coming, literally, a mile away.

I heard it, amist all the "Uggas" and grunts: a strong chanting of "NOT IN THE BUTT!" said by none other than Naruto Uzumaki. Not the fishcake. The guy. The guy I cheated on to be specific. Really. I mean, out of all the jail cells in the freaking jail it has to be **this **one. I swear, this is not karma but some fucked up story made by two short twelve year old Asian girls whose Birthdays are coming up pretty soon **(A/NHint, hint)**. Who am I kidding? It's karma. I cheated on the guy! My thoughts were pushed aside as the stubby officer dragged a shivering Naruto in the cell. As our eyes met he turned away from me. I don't blame him.

"Ugga?" Dyke woman looked up from the small pot lip gloss with a questionable look on her face. God, I really hope that lip-shizzle is poisonous.

Anyhow, the officer spoke fluent lesbian and grunted back an answer. If I'm correct I think might have said:

He needed time away from the gay biker.

Or maybe:

Sometimes I eat people raw with plastic spoons.

I'm not quite sure which. I turned away from the conversing sasquatches and faced Naruto. I didn't know what to say. Sorry isn't an option considering he got raped because of me. Sorry just doesn't cut it for that kind of stuff. I mean, if you got in jail for drinking underage, which you only did because your girlfriend cheated on you but then came to bail you out, only to reject you AGAIN, not to mention ditch you so you ended up getting ass raped by a gay biker plus you have a tattoo of the name of a transvestite hooker tattooed on your arm, sorry would not cut it for you either. Naruto is no exception no matter how unhuman he may seem.

"Naruto-" I stopped myself because he turned away from me and began to pee on the wall. In the end I Kiba's advice was the nly advice I used.

"BITCH! YOU DUN BEEN LYING TO ME FOR TEN YEARS! TEN YEARS! AND YOU NEVA EVEN TOLD ME YOU IS A GUY! THAT IS JUST FUCKED UP! YOU SAID 'NARUTO' WAS YOUR COVER NAME!" I screamed. Maybe Kiba isn't as dumb as he looks. Naah.

Naruto scoffed, "If I had a puppet for every time someone told me that one I'd be Mr. Rogers."

"Why can't you forgive me?"

He shot me a all knowing glare.

"Sorry. Stupid question." I lowered my eyes.

"Look, Sakura. I don't love you anymore. Please leave me alone and be happy with Sasuke." He said softly.

"Okay. Whatever." I shrugged.

He glared at me. I shrugged again; hey, if you don't mean it don't say it.

"Maybe I don't want her."

I turned around. And it was like the first time I saw him again.

"Sasuke"

There was no answer. Just a firm kiss on the lips and that was all I needed to know. I know he's a selfish, arrogant, insensitive, jerk. But he's a selfish, arrogant, insensitive jerk I wouldn't mind spending my whole life with and playing Shuffleboard with in retirement. And I hate Shuffleboard.

**Okay, how was that? Yes, we know it was crappy and short. We hate this chappie too. Yeah, so anyway we're living with our GBF (Gay Best Friend) Kyle and his senile Grandma. We sadly think Kyle is a bit hot. His boyfriend isn't and he's a bitch.**

**Here is a link to a picture of both of them if you want to see 'em.**

http / i 6 . photobucket . com / albums / y 2 0 3 / Lapang/ 7 9 8 9 6 6 1 7 9l . jpg

(no spaces of course) 

**If you think Kyle and his boyfriend are both ugly then you are half right. Me and Christian still think Kyle's a bit hot.**

**Anyway, the reason why we cut this chapter short is because we have a couple of ideas for a new SasuSaku fic so please help us decide which idea we'll turn in to a fic.**

**1. Sakura is in love with her gay best friend, Sasuke (hopefully not too Ooc) and finds out she has only ten days to live thanks to a unknown terminal illness. So she forms a list of things to do before she dies. Top on her list: Win over Sasuke Uchiha. **

**2. Sakura owns a sweets shop and has a freakish knack for guessing people's favorite candies. Sasuke's a stoic handy man who comes to the shop because it's his job to fix it up but hates sweets. Except one. But which one? Not even Sakura knows. That's for her to find out. Inspired by the movie Chcolat. **

**3. Sakura is in the hospital for overdosing on caffine. Sasuke is a male nurse whose forced to watch over her 24/7 for two months in case she sneaks any caffine.**

**Please, if you don't usually review please review with what idea you want to be made in to a fic. Or maybe you have an idea that's better than my crappy ideas or something you want to add to an idea I have. Just review and tell me. **

**Love,**

**Lauren and Christian**

**(Even though Christian's napping right now) **


	26. IMPORTANT! PLEASE READ!

Hey babes! This is Christian and Lauren. This is not a chapter I think you know that right?So yeah, just telling you that the new fic we were talking about is out! It's called 15Things To Do Before I Die. So read and review bitches! We love it already. We are so over this fic already because it sucks. Just read it instead of this fic. Lauren like hates I won't cross these streets unil you hold my hand. She's denying that she ever had anything to do with it and her alibi is that I wrote it, claimed that she did. But there was no way in hell she wrote it because she was away in France having Adam Brody's children. Heh. For some reason I don't believe her. I also forgot to acknowledge some people for their reviews.

Bluedragon212

Mirri Nochi

Claud-kun

Loli's crazy journey

Shadowfangirl

sasusaku14

asiangirls3

itachisgirl101

tenshii-chan

I Can't Believe I'm Not Anime

Namada.69

Chia-bride

blackrose4ever

warmth of the afterglow

dark x sorrow

One life

MyUsedRomance

Saskura-chan

kaitou angel

KidManga

Krabby Patties

Krabby Patties' friend

I'm sorry if I forgot you, I'm going off memory, here. Just know you are loved all the same.

Anyway, on a sidenote Lauren was being an idiot again.

**What do you mean by again?**

Okay so, we were at Starbucks and we were standing in line, waiting for her latte and my frap...

**Oh God. I'll never hear the end of this one, will I?**

So for an unknown reason she looked down...

**Let's just say I looked down and saw a leperchaun and did a heel click. That's the end.**

-Ahem- so she looks down at her _boobs_. Then she started to scream at them. She said, and I quote:

"GET IN LINE BITCHES, OR I'M PUTTING ON A BRA!"

**Fuck you, Christian. What did you want me to do? They were arguing like two drag queens fighting over a hair dryer. The left boob was like I'm better than the right boob and the right boob was like nu-uh I'm better. But that was personal, you bitch!**

Personal? Yeah, between you, your boobs, and everyone within ten feet of Starbucks. So everyone stared at her and she _ran _away. Then like two minutes later she came back and was like: Um forgot my latte. And that, for some reason reminds me of something else that happened today...

**You make me sad.**

I have a friend name Kaleiki. He's ugly but nice and Lauren met him for the first time so he was like Hi I'm Kaleiki.

**Kaleiki is a poopface and loves Christian.**

He's a nice kid. So anyway she just stared at him for a while and

then she said. " Your name sounds like an STD."

Then she shouted:

"I GOT KALEIKI FROM HAVING UNPROTECTED SEX WITH A MALE STRIPPER!"

I find that funny because as far as I know she's a virgin.

**Nope. Last night. Me. Johnny Depp. You know what I'm talking about. HELL YES!**

Oh please. Keep your perverted dreams to yourself.

**Christian just yesterday you said you wanted to _screw _Itachi. **

Itachi isn't 42. I love Johnny but that's just creepy; he's old enough to be our _dad_.

**But Itachi isn't even real.**

Well look at the time! We have to go.

**Shut down! mmm-hmm.**

Shut yo lip. Anyway, guys, just check out the new fic and review.

Love,

**¡Asian**One!


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